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All I can think about is..

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by TheWr0ngChild, Jun 20, 2008.

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  1. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member


    I'm obsessed. I'm fanatical about movies that focus on it, I can spend whole days online reading about it. I have a particular interest in "last words" left before someone kills themself.

    I have dreams where I am dead and gone to the next world, which I have always dreamed as a nice place. I wake up and you guessed it, I want to BE dead.

    I often picture myself dead from different events (most sef inflicted). I picture the looks on people's faces when they find me, their reactions.

    I cry constantly and I'm slowly starting to think that life and death are reversed.
  2. innocencexisxlove

    innocencexisxlove Well-Known Member

    I know what you mean. I have periods of that from time to time. I'll just think only about death, and fantasize death.

    It does get better though.
  3. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    I am paragraphs 1,2,&4.

    Especially 4 when you say you think life and death are reversed. I think we have got things rather backwards. I think this is a dream. You fall asleep and most often you forget that you are dreaming, and you particiapte. We are born, we forget we are just trying on another personality, and that none of this is really real, we "die" and we wake up. Death is really life. What we call life, is really closer to death.

    I find death to be romantic. I too am always watching movies, listening to songs, wanting to hear stories about death. I'm always reading about death. Near-death experiences, the afterlife. My favorite topic of discussion with anyone is death. I usually start out with, what do you think heaven's like? I don't care who I'm talking to or what the situation is, I always bring it up. It sounds terrible, but I always get excited when a friend tells me that once they almost died or what not. I have so many questions? Was it painful? What did you see? You are so lucky.

    I think death is a good thing. It is just passing on to another place. Not to say that we should kill ourselves. We should make the most out of the time we're here. We obviously decided (yes decided) to come here for a reason, to learn something, and why waste an oppurtunity?

    But while I'm here I still can't help but think about my death and all the exciting things that may or may not follow it.

    I dream of last words, final goodbye's, last kisses, the last sunset, the end of the world, the last days, my last meal, the last time I will lie down to fall asleep.
  4. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member

    I've yet to see proof of that.
  5. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    have faith :hug:
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