All I Want To Do Is Help People

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by ~Nobody~, Dec 11, 2006.

  1. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:
     
  2. Wonderstuff

    Wonderstuff Staff Alumni

    :hug: :hug: :hug: And I'm sure you do hun. But please, please don't give out more than you're getting, don't hurt yourself :hug: You deserve help just as much as anyone else!
     
  3. Always Alone

    Always Alone Guest

    You DO help people, whats making you feel bad about it? You need help too sometimes, look after yourself, and then help others.

    If you really want to help, then you can start by telling us whats making you feel bad.

    Take care :hug:
     
  4. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    :cry: Thanks guys...

    What set me off is PMing back and forth with someone this morning. They were really upset, I thought we were getting somewhere, but now they've gone and done God knows what. I feel so useless and helpless and pathetic. I should have been able to do more. :cry:

    This is the first time the forums have made me feel bad. But everyone saying they're gonna go and kill themselves now/tomorrow/next week/whatever... It's good because often we can help people and help them through it but if we can't then what's the point in anything? :sad: If people won't keep talking what more can I do?? :blub:

    I am pathetic.
     
  5. sadsong

    sadsong Staff Alumni

    please don't blame yourself. :hug:

    I have been in this situation many times and it is so hard, constantly worrying, the guilt, the feeling of if only. But please be assured that it is not your fault...there is nothing more you could have done...you will have helped them.

    ultimately there is only a limited amount we can do with only words over a computer, but trust me they do really help. A person's actions is only the responsibility of that individual, it is NOT your fault.

    i know it's hard, but keep on trying to help people
     
  6. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    Thank you sadsong :hug:.

    Don't worry, one thing I won't stop doing is trying to help people. It's what I live for! :mellow:

    EDIT: And thank you for the PM, Always Alone. :hug:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 11, 2006
  7. netean

    netean Active Member

    i can definately understand that feeling of thinking that you're not helping, or not knowing what to say or how to help.

    If you're a natural "helper" it's hard not to worry about such things.

    But, if you can, why not go and train to be a counsellor, therapist, professional listener, professional helper.
    Go volunteer at your local Mental Health Charity (Mind in the uk.. www.mind.org.uk I believe) or at the samaritans.
    They will give you some training, and SOME training will help you.

    even a little training will not only help you help others better, but will help you help yourself - sounds wierd, but it does - When you start to really help people - by that I mean in a formalised way you start to become a bit more detached (which is how you can help more) and in doing so, you see your problems in a totally different way.
     
  8. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    I intend to :smile:. I want to go into Counselling Psychology.

    Thanks for the advice. It's just the knowing there's nothing more I can do, and at the same time not knowing whether this person is okay...

    I probably load too much responsibility onto myself. But I am worried.
     
  9. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    Hun you do help people, and you have helped me! more than you know. I love reading your post's and i think your a great help to SF! :hug:
     
  10. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    Awwww, thank you! :hug:

    I'm actually smiling. :smile: Thank you sweetheart.
     
  11. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    hehe good :biggrin:

    I mean everyword :smile: :hug:
     
  12. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    You do help people sweetheart!!! Just being there helps so much...but, at times when people feel so awful and have a bad state of mind, sometimes there is nothing you can do but just be there for them.


    And....beleive me, I know the feeling, I have felt that way before. I beleive I just posted something pretty close to this not too long ago. But you do help, you are a great help, more than you know hun... you are a great people, it's a wonderful privaledge to know you hun!!



    I am so glad you found SF, so far I have really enjoyed knowing you and seeing your posts, I hope you stick around hun, I hope to get to know you more soon! I have just been so drained mentally and physically I haven't PMed a lot of people I would like to and that I am thinking about and praying for.


    Hang in there hun, you deserve help and support also!!! you are a wonderfuly helpful, caring, beautiful person!!! please remember that no matter what happends in life. You are wonderful, no matter what you think or anyone says.



    Take care sweetheart!!!! :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :cheekkiss




    -Big hugs and best wishes-,
    Carolyn






    PS - if you ever want to PM me to get to know eachother or talk or support or anything, don't hesitate, I would love hearing from you! :)
     
  13. TLA

    TLA Antiquitie's Friend

    Hey,
    I too understand where you are coming from. Now, is a great time for you to learn/practice boundaries. Only cuz it is a tough thing to master.
    I have said some nice, good timing, encouraging things and I have hurt feelings and not thought out my writings first. You just do all you can.


    When you speak of people making plans or attempts...remember what time of year it is...what triggers occur due to family...what responsibility that uni or school, work affects things.

    Continue !!! the "helping", but know your limits. As I learned " you must take care of yourself in order to help others".
    See ya around,

    TLA
     
  14. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    Thank you Carolyn :hug: :hug:

    :smile:

    x x
     
  15. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    By the way, if any of you guys were wondering too, the person in question is very wobbly and unhappy, but still with us this morning.

    I'm just doing the best I can now. I'm beginning to understand that that has to be good enough! :smile:
     
  16. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    I am glad you are ok hun, I really am, I was worried, but you are a strong and wonderful person, and I have faith you will make it sweetie, take it one day at a time (I know that's hard to do).....and I will PM you sometime soon! :hug: :hug: :hug:


    With much love,
    Carolyn