All you survivors, I have a qestion

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by No1_knows_me, Sep 28, 2010.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. No1_knows_me

    No1_knows_me Active Member

    How did you family, other relatives, friends, loved ones and so on react to your suicide attempt? I'm just curious. Suicide is on my mind every day and right now the only thing stopping me is the fear of failing. Did you have the same fear or does it go away once you're 100% ready to commit a suicide?
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I think more ppl have a fear of living...and everyone who loves you would be devastated...J
  3. muv_ur_dolly

    muv_ur_dolly Member

    When I tried and failed my Fiance found out and was in the Emergence room of the Hospital with me, then the Emergence Psyc ward....

    It was very very hard on him, it still is. He's hurting so much - he's afraid to leave me alone because he thinks he's going to lose me.

    That fear you're feeling most likely won't go away - Please reconsider. I was the same as you, thinking about it everyday till the point It felt like I had to do it. But now I'm in this outpaitent program and it's starting to help. Can you give that a try? I see you're in Finland, I know there health care is really good, esspically mental health (Lived in Tampere for a while).

    You can be happy again too, take it from me.

    Please feel free to PM me,

  4. dreams4life

    dreams4life Well-Known Member

    everyone would feel terrible. Please do not give in to the wrong way. In this life you can have comfort and peace. You have to take control of the feelings. You are a strong person. We are here to help. Have you truly tried all the means of survival and deliverance?
  5. No1_knows_me

    No1_knows_me Active Member

    No, I haven't tried. I've never told anyone face to face how I feel. I've never tried therapy. The thing is I don't have the courage to do that. I just can't tell my parents and I can't pick up the phone and tell a doctor about this stuff. It's either a suicide or someone else gets help for me because I can't do it myself.
  6. WorldBurns2Death

    WorldBurns2Death Well-Known Member

    My family reacted harshly, Claiming how selfish it was and blah blah...Im sorry but I dont see suicide as being selfish, I shouldnt have to stay alive in misery just so you know Im alive.
  7. sunflowers

    sunflowers New Member

    It went unseen to my family and friends. I was in hospital for six days when I told everyone it was a cry for attention (it wasn't, but I was so upset at myself at failing yet another thing, and I couldn't bear to be stuck in an institution for months). My sister has bipolar disorder and so my parents -stupidly- put it down to the fact that she was getting more attention than I was and this was the only way I could see to fix it.

    You'd think though, that they would worry just a little. My parents don't worry about my sanity. It didn't really affect my family like it should, I suppose.

    My best friend's sister also committed four years ago, and my friend hasn't spoken a word since. They weren't even very close.. She cries every night and is now a selective mute. I wouldn't do it again, simply because I can't leave her.

    I had a great psychiatrist back in NZ. He said;

    There isn't anything on this earth worth living, nor dying for. So why not just amble along, and go the natural way.

    Smile, chin up.
  8. stig

    stig Well-Known Member

    shit!!!! it is hard. i failed and was put into hospital, my family came up. i looked my sister in the eye and told her i wanted to die. my mum too. i couldn't have hurt them any more. we all cried together. it was the saddest day of my life, to see the pain in loved ones eyes. it broke me.
  9. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    Er, from what I remember my mother was just confused/bumbling/zoned out way back.

    I haven't attempted for years but been through many many crises. What they don't get is that an attempt is so so close by if I'm accessing crisis help again.

    The reactions are:
    -sister starts drinking heavily and goes psychotic on me and i need to deal with it although i'm not around her any more (she uses the phone)
    -mother starts talking about god and how she's not to blame. and just doesn't want to know. 's'all up to 'god.'

    conclusion: mass denial, and turning to alcohol and the god channel :smile:
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 30, 2010
  10. dreams4life

    dreams4life Well-Known Member

    There are options. I personally find comfort in a Divine help. I can understand how hard it could be to confess this to someone. They would start blaming themselves and others for the situation. But look at others. Everyone has to go through this. Look at the inspirational videos online like Pianist Liu Wei or Nick Vujicic. You can overcome this feelings. There is hope. :console:
  11. ace1972

    ace1972 Member

    my hands were shaking when I had an OD attempt. I wanted to get rid of destroys your family. The look of despair on my moms face was something i never want to see again. Life sucks, yes. You to change how you deal with thoughts...thats whatim tyring to do...not easy
  12. stoneme

    stoneme New Member

    I have attempted 3 times where it was a desperate cry for help (and I knew that I would survive) and 1 real attempt where I prayed for the end.
    My two sisters were informed and it was as if nothing had taken place.
    my real last attempt was around 2003 and although I drift in and out of deppression and anxiety for the most part medication and a change in lifestyle has helped.This weekend has seen my lowest point in a long time when I stumbled upon this website, Talking to my partner, who also suffers from depression, this website and plenty of sleep/rest has subdued any thoughts of ending it all. It is very hard at the moment as I had forgot how much these feelings drain the energy out you.
    As for what others may think when you are so low and depressed and in that state of no return then all thoughts of what others may think go out the window.I knew that yesterday when my little grandaughter said "love you grandad" and I knew that for the time being I was not as low as to die....
  13. Born Dead

    Born Dead Member

    My grandmother and mother drove me to the hospital as if it was some kind of chore. It was an OD, and I vaguely remember feeling violently ill and my grandmother saying something along the lines of "you stupid girl".
    I don't remember much of anything else apart from waking up in the hospital with charcoal all over me, and my mum complaining that she was going to have to take time off work as I wasn't allowed to be by myself. It seems that I thought I was a burden, and I was right.
  14. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    Its the hardest thing to do when you have wires all over your body with your husband staring down at you crying (when he never cries) knowing you did that to him
  15. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    TBH i felt like kicking those people in the face when i was on a hospital bed back when i was 19. i didn't feel guilty i felt disgusted at their sudden shock.
  16. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    The last time I left hospital there was no one to pick me up, no one to meet me, nothing I got kicked out early morning went home showered and went to work pretending nothing had happened, except you know those ecg patches they stick all over you, yeah I kept finding them stuck to me at work, almost funny really.
  17. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    the ECG yeah! bastard things!
  18. Nothinglefttolose

    Nothinglefttolose New Member

    My family didn't notice that I didn't get out of bed for 3 days and was extremely ill for a few days after. My one friend that I told told me I did it for attention and that I was selfish.
  19. Lonewolf3

    Lonewolf3 Active Member

    At the moment: My sister said the first thing she did was try to keep her mom calmed down...step-mom was said 'i lost my baby'

    In the hospital: dad was upset 'said, if you do that again kill us too', step-mom disagreed, sister asked mom if i'd look like that forever (my eyes were wide) lol

    If your going to try it, don't whatever it takes to keep yourself from going there first of all...i wish someone would have told me that everything was going to be ok, and just to hang in there b/c its just a speed bump in the road.

    Aftermath: lost all of my friends that i really never hung out with, my nursing career is shot and im erratic b/c i dont know what to expect next and my current mistrust with my family is starting to make me feel pretty :cold:
  20. StarryNightSky

    StarryNightSky Well-Known Member

    My dad told me to do it. Not much else to say.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.