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The only person that knows I'm struggling is my ex, and he said that if I felt like I was going to kill myself I should call him, so I did last night, but he didn't answer or call back. I made it through the night and thought today was going better, but now I'm feeling as bad, maybe worse.

I walked outside to look at the moon, which was hard since my legs are so numb, but I couldn't find it. I thought maybe it was hidden behind the train depot which is across the street so I walked over to the tracks. I didn't have any plans but as I stood there I thought how badly I wanted my life to end. I looked down the tracks and saw the lights of a train stopped about a block away. I think I'm more scared of trying and failing than dying. I don't want to end up in the hospital or have to face my parents.

Does anyone else feel so much worse the later it gets? Anyone have any suggestions on how to make it through the nights? I'd appreciate any advice.


Well-Known Member
Just writing here about how you feel or what has happened can help a bit, respond to the other threads on the forum, it gives you a thing to do at night and maybe even encourage someone else a bit.
I'm on here from time to time when i can't sleep, listening to music while looking random stuff on the net and reading and posting on here.
Maybe it doesn't help but it's what I do regularly at night to ease my mind a bit.
Even if you make some angry rants here it's better then keeping all the feelings inside.


Well-Known Member
Meditation's good, posting here is awesome, you can both get help from THE MOST supportive forum I've EVER seen and you can help other people with their problems, which you may enjoy. You could also get one of those calming noise machines, ones that just play ocean sounds and stuff, that might calm you down enough to get you to go to sleep earlier and sleep longer and everything.
Exercise helps too, but it has to be enough to really tire you out before you go to bed. Getting TO the exercise may be the most difficult part, depending on how you feel that day.

I think I'm more scared of trying and failing than dying. I don't want to end up in the hospital or have to face my parents.
:hug: Same here. But you don't need to even try it, because everyone here supports you and wants you to be well and most importantly, ALIVE!

PM me if you need anything, I'm always available.
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