I have been feeling a bit better, but now I am pretty upset because I was taking a shower and a huge handful of hair came out. The medication I'm on can cause major hair loss (after all, its a chemo med) and I was hoping this wouldn't happen. (the medication is used for chemo, but also for RA which I have) and I am really upset thinking that in another month, I could be bald. Sigh. What REALLY worries me though, is getting through the next couple of days. I am directly in Irene's path, and the odds are I will lose power and it may b e off for days. If I feel suicidal or depressed, I will not be able to communicate with anyone or call for any kind of help. I have no cell phone, and my land line goes out when my power goes out. I am stuck in an apartment full of items I can use to kill myself, items I am tempted to use even as I type this. What will I do if I can't call a friend, can't call a hotline, can't call for help, can't even post online? I am hanging on by a thread as it is. I have been feeling better, but I'm still struggling. The next few days will be the PERFECT Time to kill myself. No hope of rescue, or of changing my mind. I just dont' know how I'm going to deal with it. I'm just trying not to think about it. Does anyone have any advice for me? I know going bald shouldn't be grounds for suicide, there are always wigs, and such, but its been such a hard week, and I am afraid of going crazy if I'm entirely cut off from the world.