alone with no one

This is my first post on here. But i have got to that point in my life where i feel there is no where else to turn.
I think of ending things every day... I think of the effects it will have on my family and the effects on their lives. But always end up back in the same dark place.
I have one friend i have known 20yrs and now i bearly speak to her as she has a New friend who hates me and tells me daily.
I have been to the doctors, been on the tablets and been to counselling (where my councillor fell asleep!)
I can't keep up this pretence anymore.
This life is not for me

 

:hug: Not sure what I can say really.. Things can get better and it takes time sometimes.. maybe you need to find ppl who can put u in the right direction so you start moving forward. Maybe set some goals for yourself. What do you wish to be better?

I hope you have a good day and take care. :hug:

 

I think spirituality is a great help.

I don't know if you have any beliefs, but I consider myself an agnostic and a skeptic, so I turned to Buddhism.

Buddhism says that nothing lasts forever. The zen master Shunryu Suzuki used to say "not always so".

Which means that you can't count 100% on anything. Even on pain and loneliness.

If you do your part, things might change. Give it a shot. We are all doomed and poised to die anyway.

And try to meditate and control the way your mind works. Everything we feel is created and conditioned by the way we think.

Take a risk.