I want to die. My mother wants to kill herself and I am the only reason she hasn't. I know that if I kill myself I will kill my mother. The worst thing is no one knows that I want to die or that I am even depressed. I am alone in the world... The people that care about me do not really care about me, they care about the act. No one knows Steven, the Steven that cries himself to sleep. I’ve wanted to disappear for years but never has the will to kill myself ever been so strong. I want to scream it, I want to let some one see the scars but... I guess I'm scared. I just want some one in the world to know.