Already Been To the Psych Ward Twice

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by fromthatshow, Feb 19, 2009.

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  1. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    So I'm feeling very suicidal. I've already been twice for feeling suicidal and not actually attempting. Can I really go a third time while getting nothing accomplished and putting everyone through that?
    I don't want to go to work, don't want to stay home. I'm lonely but I can't find anyone I enjoy spending time with. I have no desire to continue my life. I've lived to a good age of 19.
     
  2. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    I've been twice, too, for the very same reasons. I asked 'em if it was too much to come a second time and they said no, I should come as often as I need to feel safe. Each time I go I learn a tiny bit more about how to survive depression. Doesn't mean it goes away but I feel better able to cope after a week in the unit.

    If it is a safe place (I recognize every unit is different) then I say why not go. At the very least it can be a safe way to spend a few days and no waiting list to see the mental health nurses or the social worker!

    What worries you about going back?
     
  3. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    I've been twice in the last year.
    I'm worried that my work won't appreciate it, nor my family, that they'll be frustrated. I'm scared of living... and I know if I'm there there will be no way to attempt :( :cold:
     
  4. AnomymousX

    AnomymousX Well-Known Member

    I've been to the psych ward once, and it made things worse.
     
  5. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    Well work and family don't know much about depression if they expect you to be better already. That's just so unrealistic. These feelings come in waves... sometimes it seems okay and the next minute you are underwater. Healing from depression and feeling suicidal can take a long time.

    I know what you mean about being scared to live, I feel that way too. At the very least, you could put your plan on hold and see what the professionals can do to help. Not being able to harm yourself is one of the pluses of being in the hospital, even though it doesn't seem that way right now. But perhaps there is some small part of you that wants to keep fighting. I hope so....
     
  6. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    Thanks Dazzle
    don't know what I'm going to do
     
  7. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    I'll be holding you in my thoughts and I hope you find a way to stay safe....
     
  8. Vitreledonellidae

    Vitreledonellidae Well-Known Member

    hullashoop everyone, your work, your family, your friends, see you rather alive than dead and if you think going to a psych ward will help you and they really care about you they should just respect that. You gotto do the things that will keep you here and that will make you feel better and happy, thats what everyone wants for you.
     
  9. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    It'd be much easier if I were dead though. I've got the means I think. Drift into unconscious sleep ahhh
     
  10. Vitreledonellidae

    Vitreledonellidae Well-Known Member

    :( i know it feels like it would make things easier, but it wont, at all, maybe for you, but im sure you know damn well it wouldnt make things easier for others.
     
  11. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    my family doesn't care,
    few friends
    work will get over it
    I'm not worried about anyone else really :hug:
     
  12. Vitreledonellidae

    Vitreledonellidae Well-Known Member

    You know what i think
    Youre a great guy, Would be a damn shame
    Very talented
    Sweet, helpfull, cheering everyone up here
    Not always a good mod (just kidding :p)
    I think SF needs you :eek:hmy:
    But things really can get better, believe me :hug:

    ..and *chop chop*
     
  13. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    thanks Julie yeah SF is one of the things that keeps me going.
    actually if I ever was in the hospital after an attempt I'd want you guys to know first before my family or anything :laugh:
     
  14. Vitreledonellidae

    Vitreledonellidae Well-Known Member

    Lol yeah i feel like that too, i have a list with names in my sketchbook of some people from sf my family has to contact when something happens.
    but i hope we never have to hear you attempted or comitted :sad:
     
  15. mdmefontaine

    mdmefontaine Antiquities Friend

    hey - i'm around if you want to talk to me...

    it is definitely worth your while to go to the psych ward if you are feeling suicidal. and the whole point is, yes, that you are not able to attempt. or to accomplish, while you are there.

    the whole point is hun, the inner part of you that reaches out here, wanting to live. and that part of you is the part that helps people on here. . . .

    at 19 you have so much ahead and you have many opportunities to create the life that you want. . . not the one you have. a better one. please go to the psych ward. be honest. if you want to talk before you leave, pm me. for SURE let us know after. .. that you are ok.
    we are all here for each other - and we are not, i am not, going to let go of you..... :hug:
     
  16. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    thank you so much :wub:
    just sleep it off and see how I feel tomorrow I guess.
    maybe go to the psych ward thsi weekend
     
  17. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    :whack: to both of you. I'd cry buckets if anything were to happen to you's.
    Spence, i know easier said than done, but over look everything else. you need to be safe, if a psych ward is where you are safe then do it, you never know third time luvky something might be different please for those of us who cant do it, you do it, be safe and happy(ish) :hug:


    Listen to the sheep :mad:
     
  18. brokenandlonely

    brokenandlonely Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear your feeling that way Spencer... hope it gets better for you. I'm here if you want to talk... I'm not doing so good myself lately but I'm trying to hang in there. I think what you had said a few posts up about drifting into unconsious sleep is what I've been thinking about for the longest time.. until that happens I'm just trying to make the most out of what I have going. Very few friends, no real family but I'm holding onto what's real.
     
  19. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    I don't deserve all this support.
    I'm such a hypocrit. I always tell people yes you deserve our help as much as the next person, but I don't include myself. I don't take my own advice. I feel guilty for making this thread and having this many people respond.
    It feel like I've only taken and have given nothing.
    I can rationally tell myself I deserve help, but I still feel guilty as hell.
     
  20. mdmefontaine

    mdmefontaine Antiquities Friend

    hey, we've already been talking hun. but i am not going to let this '''hang''' here with you saying you are not deserving of the support. that is not true...you are playing the loop of 'bad messages' over and over. stop.you are worth it - and we are here for you - so much!

    keep in touch over the weekend, so that we don't worry. . . . xxxxx
     
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