Already dead?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by TheWr0ngChild, Dec 21, 2007.

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  1. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member

    I don't know if anyone will be able to understand this, but I feel like the only reason I'm alive is the fact my physical body is still alive, I feel like my mind died a long time ago. I used to be a funny, creative, imaginative, energetic soul, till things happened, really soul crushing things like 2 years of verbal and mental abuse in a supported housing scheme, and a servere bad reaction to the contraceptive pill, I was never a "happy" person, but before these things happened, I used to see the "point" of existance, I used to appreciate things, not matter how small. I used to do a lot of art and music, the pill made me forget how to do these things, I know it sounds far fetched and stupid, but it wracked my memory and capability to retain things for long periods of time, I stopped taking it, but I'm still effected by the fallout from it. :sad:
     
  2. liveinhope

    liveinhope Well-Known Member

    i found your post very moving perhaps partly becouse i to feel dead inside just a shell that operates is left, th reaction from the pill sounds horrific , i feel for u and relate to how u r feeling please feel free to pm me if u need to talk take care hun many hugs x
     
  3. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member

    I have tried so many things to try and right it, cut out rubbish food, I lost weight which was good, but still suffered the after effects of the pill, went to the doctor who told me to take more pills, I tried to get my interests back, but that was about as much use as trying to revive a skeleton, complete non starter.
     
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