Am I cured?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Rooftop, May 31, 2009.

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  1. Rooftop

    Rooftop Member

    Hi all.
    An interesting thought here.
    I have suffered from depression for a number of years now, it has been an constant presence. I don't know why though, but I have not felt depressed since about the beginning of March, this is about the longest I've ever gone without an 'episode'. This is really odd. Obviously I don't believe I'm 'cured' all of a sudden, but I do wonder why I appear not to be as bad as I used to be. It's not as if the past few months haven't been stressful or full of the usual triggers I try and avoid.
    Ok though, here's my worry. I get my degree results soon and I doubt this will be a pleasurable experience, both before and after. Am I due a massive episode?
    On another note, am I normal in not being entirely happy about the possibilty of not being depressed, as odd as that sounds seeing that it is a horrible debilitating illness that I hate. It's like a small part of me is missing atm.
  2. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    You said it perfectly. It's like a small part of you is missing. Depression becomes apart of your self identity so when you feel happy for an extended episode like you describe it can be uncomfortable because it's so different.
    Be thankful for it and don't question it just go with it. Obviously something's working and you're not missing anything by leaving the depressed part of yourself behind, in the past where it belongs. For as long as it can stay there. As long as you feel comfortable :hug:
  3. pippy

    pippy Member

    i've thought just the same thing

    like do i really want to get better? cos i i do will there be anything left of me? or will i just be some person who gets on with life?

    but then i dont want people to notice me anyway.

    it doesn't make sense.

    all i can say is, hold on to the feeling as long as its here and dont worry too much about getting another episode
  4. Rooftop

    Rooftop Member

    Thanks guys. I'm glad I'm not the only one. It is an odd feeling that is hard to describe. You are right Pippy I should enjoy this moment, because I know that an episode will strike at some point.
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