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Am I depressed or just lazy?

hazeleyes

Active Member
#1
I used to be suicidal.
For years I would dream and fantasize how I would kill myself. I almost did it too, many times. I only actually attempted once, but that was a half ass effort because I was scared. From age 16 to about 24 I was consumed with suicidal thoughts. Every second, waking and in my dreams I wanted to die.
Today, I don’t think I would kill myself. I have thoughts and sometimes they do get intense. But my life feels more like mine now, not in the way that I want it but still, I’m more content, I guess.
I work full time in a job that’s not awful but some people are and that makes it hard to want to continue working there. I had a part-time minimum wage job that I loved and made me happy but unfortunately I lost that due to the pandemic. I don’t have friends and I’ve never even been in a relationship. I have a hard time trusting people and allowing myself to connect and form close relationships.
I don’t know that I feel depressed anymore. Not like chronically or clinically. But situationally, like most people experience. But I do know that I’m always tired. I never have the energy or motivation or desire to do things.
Dishes or organizing or other things I need to do, I don’t. I don’t shower as often as I really should, I especially don’t wash my hair that often. I don’t work out so I don’t smell (deodorant, perfume, and clean clothes are a thing). I don’t cook food. I live off snacks from my pantry.
Am I depressed or just lazy? I don’t feel depressed, not in the way that I used to, or not in any way at all for that matter (for the most part). So I’m probably just lazy? But I also don’t feel happy. I just feel… like an emotionless slug just existing.
 

Kiwi2016

🦩 Now a flamingo, not a kiwi 🦩
Forum Pro
#2
I can understand how you feel as I too feel that way a lot of the time. The lack of energy seems draining in and of itself. The one thing that I have found that helps is going for a walk in the morning before work as that gets me moving at least and seeing the sunrise gives me hope for the rest of the day somehow. For me I believe this is a form of depression which I have come to accept but also work to strive to not let it consume me if that makes any sense. So be gentle on yourself and maybe find one thing that helps you start your day on a positive note...whether it be a walk, reading, journaling, knitting/crafting... Sending you *hug.
 

iloverachel

Well-Known Member
#3
I used to be suicidal.
For years I would dream and fantasize how I would kill myself. I almost did it too, many times. I only actually attempted once, but that was a half ass effort because I was scared. From age 16 to about 24 I was consumed with suicidal thoughts. Every second, waking and in my dreams I wanted to die.
Today, I don’t think I would kill myself. I have thoughts and sometimes they do get intense. But my life feels more like mine now, not in the way that I want it but still, I’m more content, I guess.
I work full time in a job that’s not awful but some people are and that makes it hard to want to continue working there. I had a part-time minimum wage job that I loved and made me happy but unfortunately I lost that due to the pandemic. I don’t have friends and I’ve never even been in a relationship. I have a hard time trusting people and allowing myself to connect and form close relationships.
I don’t know that I feel depressed anymore. Not like chronically or clinically. But situationally, like most people experience. But I do know that I’m always tired. I never have the energy or motivation or desire to do things.
Dishes or organizing or other things I need to do, I don’t. I don’t shower as often as I really should, I especially don’t wash my hair that often. I don’t work out so I don’t smell (deodorant, perfume, and clean clothes are a thing). I don’t cook food. I live off snacks from my pantry.
Am I depressed or just lazy? I don’t feel depressed, not in the way that I used to, or not in any way at all for that matter (for the most part). So I’m probably just lazy? But I also don’t feel happy. I just feel… like an emotionless slug just existing.
I was in the same boat once
To answer your question, I wouldn't call it laziness, but maybe fatigue? Depression does give you low energy and lack of motivation. They are symptoms of depression.

Personally, I found that easing into an exercise routine helps a lot in the long term. Exercise boosts endorphins and increases energy production over the long term, which could help you stop feeling tired or "lazy all the time"

I used to sleep 10+ hours a day and didn't shower or shave or exercise. Now I train for hours a day and am full of energy.

It takes baby steps but you can get better if you put in the work. For me i went to the gym only once every 2 days for like 20-30 minutes and gradually increased it. Your energy levels will increase slowly. Suddenly you will be full of energy.

Just be patient, stay disciplined and don't give up
 

LOSTINSIGHT

Well-Known Member
#4
Lazy is an archaic disparaging term to describe someone ,our bodies are extraordinarily complex.
Go to YouTube and study nutrition and exercise.the worst diet on the planet is called the 'SAD' diet (standard American diet)
You could have an issue with motivation, this is were your getting into neurotransmitters like dopamine, ive been plagued by this my whole life.
Give yourself the time to learn about everything you can,our personality type affects how we interact with our surroundings also.
We are what we consume to a certain extent.
Take care.
 

Lane

SF Supporter
#5
I used to be suicidal.
For years I would dream and fantasize how I would kill myself. I almost did it too, many times. I only actually attempted once, but that was a half ass effort because I was scared. From age 16 to about 24 I was consumed with suicidal thoughts. Every second, waking and in my dreams I wanted to die.
Today, I don’t think I would kill myself. I have thoughts and sometimes they do get intense. But my life feels more like mine now, not in the way that I want it but still, I’m more content, I guess.
I work full time in a job that’s not awful but some people are and that makes it hard to want to continue working there. I had a part-time minimum wage job that I loved and made me happy but unfortunately I lost that due to the pandemic. I don’t have friends and I’ve never even been in a relationship. I have a hard time trusting people and allowing myself to connect and form close relationships.
I don’t know that I feel depressed anymore. Not like chronically or clinically. But situationally, like most people experience. But I do know that I’m always tired. I never have the energy or motivation or desire to do things.
Dishes or organizing or other things I need to do, I don’t. I don’t shower as often as I really should, I especially don’t wash my hair that often. I don’t work out so I don’t smell (deodorant, perfume, and clean clothes are a thing). I don’t cook food. I live off snacks from my pantry.
Am I depressed or just lazy? I don’t feel depressed, not in the way that I used to, or not in any way at all for that matter (for the most part). So I’m probably just lazy? But I also don’t feel happy. I just feel… like an emotionless slug just existing.
Hi there. It sounds like you're dealing with life. From reading what you wrote, you dont sound lazy. You sound depressed.

I say this because I was you. Just grabbing snacks from the cabinets. Waiting to shower when I had really had to. Finding no joy in even talking with my children. Everything, going to the store, work, feeding my cats, waking up, especially was a chore. This was years after feeling extremely suicidal when I had ongoing depression and other diagnoses.

You aren't lazy. I feel that is actually a label. You are in a state of mind. I benefited at times from counseling when I was able, medicine to keep consistent, a job to pay my bills. I finally found the right combination if medicine however I still have problems and dont know how my life will turn out. You are welcome to PM me.
 

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