Am I depressed?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Downpour, Oct 1, 2012.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Downpour

    Downpour Well-Known Member

    Sometimes I don't believe I'm depressed. Whenever I thought about telling the doctor, I would tell myself that it must all be in my head, that I'm just making it all up. For what though? Why would I be creating this for myself? For attention? But I haven't told anyone, just my doctor, and I could barely manage that. I feel so stupid, so childish when they ask about how I hurt myself and how I would kill myself. I mean, they must be thinking that I'm ridiculous. If I'm seriously thinking about suicide, there must be something legitimately messed up with me, right? That's what I told myself and that's why I eventually talked to my doctor about it. But I still don't know if I really believe I'm depressed. Maybe this is just my personality. Maybe I am just incredibly lazy and pessimistic and cynical and horrible. I always get the 'major depression' scores on those depression quizzes, but they are so easy to manipulate that I can't be sure that I'm being completely honest. Do I want to be depressed? But, again, why would I want this? My doctor and therapist think I'm very depressed. Am I manipulating the situation so that they believe I'm depressed? Or am I finally able to drop all the charades of normality when I talk to them because I know they are there to help? I have to pretend to be normal with my family and at work. I can often pull it off, but sometimes I can't. But if I'm able to pretend to be normal, then maybe it's possible that there just isn't anything actually wrong with me. I don't know. I'm just rambling here, trying to sort out all these thoughts. Any input would be appreciated.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi hun doctors have a way of knowing if someone is truly depressed i too often think my depression is just something i made up it is not real but if you can be open with you doctor really truthful youcan get the supports in place everyone needs some supports sometimes maybe this is just your time for help hun
  3. Legacy

    Legacy Member

    I agree with Eclipse. I think that you should listen to your doctors and therapists and get the help that you need. I also think that over thinking when you suffer with depression can make it harder to deal with, but i understand that that is not an easy thing to stop. The best thing to do is to get all of the support available and don't think that it's a waste of time or that you don't need it just because of the way that your mind may work sometimes. The best way forward is with help :)
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.