Am I in the right place?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by gripster, Dec 8, 2011.

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  1. gripster

    gripster Member

    not sure if this is the right area or even the right Forum.

    Been having an affair, it looks like it will remain like this for ever, problem is, I can't handle this anymore. But I can't see any point in continuing my life to find someone else, am now too old to start a family, not really bothered anymore about careers etc have travelled, lived, loved and lost, I would say to anyone young on here that life really is worth the trials when you're young, there really are some amazing things to experience, but once you have done that, and there is no one to share the remains of your life with, then I really see no point. tried to speak to the Samaritans tonight thats was the second time in 2 years, really not going to try that again, tried my doctor, he thought I needed medicating and pointed me in the direction of mental support.

    I just want to be loved and love in return, but surely that has to be with the person you love or there really is no point?
     
  2. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    love doesn't have to be romantic love. you can find love right here, if you want to :hug: :)

    I think that in order to make love relationships work, it's important to be able to live without them. being dependent on a relationship usually creates problems in that relationship
     
  3. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    love doesn't have to be romantic love. you can find love right here, if you want to :hug: :)

    I think that in order to make love relationships work, it's important to be able to live without them. being dependent on a relationship usually creates problems in that relationship
     
  4. Severijn

    Severijn Well-Known Member

    I don't know what age you are, but don't they often say "You're never too old for love".

    You say you have an 'affair'? Do you mean a 'loveless' sexual relationship? I also want more than that really.

    Perhaps using online dating services is an idea if you can't find someone in your area...?
     
  5. gripster

    gripster Member

    To be honest that is not the issue, my problem is that in 2 months I know I cannot continue the relationship as it is and I will have to move, but I cannot find the energy for that and trying to find someone else, I want this, and if I can’t have it then there is no point in continuing. I have no family that will really miss me, no friends that are going to really be affected by my passing.
    I have done what I have done in this life, some of it good, some of it amazing ( to me at least) but now I am doing something abhorrent and if nothing good is to come of this then I am best being on my way with as little grief to anyone else as possible. I have taken the time to read some of the stories on here and I have had a friend that took her life, at the time I didn’t understand but I do now, it really is easier not to go on, and I feel for the young people here who are undergoing unbeleivable stress, I had non of that so I feel like a fraud wanting to bail out with no reason, but there is no reason to go on either.
     
  6. gripster

    gripster Member

    After joining I posted a few times and felt better, even a bit fraudulent for being here as there are some people on here who have really had it rough and I admire their strength, but had a bad day today and got back to thinking about the off and realised after doing a bit of reading that my pension will cover the small amount of credit card debt I have so I don't have to worry about that being left to any relatives, I just need to clear the flat and sell the car to webuyanycrap.com will give most of the stuff to the local animal shelter places, the rest of the details are fairly straight forward and not repeatable.
    All seems to easy but I am sure it wont be. like the song says:

    THIS IS THE DAY -- Your life will surely change.
    You could've done anything -- if you'd wanted
    And all your friends and family think that you're lucky.
    But the side of you they'll never see
    Is when you're left alone with the memories
    That hold your life together like
    Glue

    ---------- Post added at 12:22 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:19 AM ----------
     
  7. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    Yes, you're in the right place. You're welcome here, and you're important to us.

    I don't know your age, but I was almost 40 when I met the love of my life, under the most unpredictable circumstances. And you know what? I wouldn't trade one minute of that relationship (and marriage) for all the sex I'd had before her. All the lonely times were an investment in being prepared for that woman.

    I'm sorry for your desperation, but I hope you'll stick around here, post some more, and make some friends. You can get encouragement and support here, and with that, your future possibilities change for the better.

    If you want to PM me, please feel free, I don't spend a lot of time at the computer, but when I do log on, the first thing I do is to check and respond to my PMs.
     
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