am i just straight up crazy?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by hunter77, Jul 12, 2012.

  1. hunter77

    hunter77 Member

    me and my gf have been dating for 2 month and its just...everytime she says something about other guys or says she loves a guys voice or something then i just get so pissed off. I am jealous but thats pretty much all she tlks about and when she says shes gonna fight another girl then i get jealous for no reason... wtf is wrong with me? i constantly worry about her. When she goes outside the house then im constantly worried that she will get raped or something bad will happen to her. this aint the the first girl i have been with that i go thru this.. its every girl i date and its driving me up the wall. its way worse with this current gf thou. I constantly think about her and worry about her and when she tlks about something else then im jealous for some stupidass reason, and if she dont tell me she loves me atleast every 10 mins then my thoughts tell me that she dont love me...anyone know whats going on? its driving me crazy cuz i really like this girl and i wanna start treating her like she should be treated and thats means she needs to be treated like a ANGEL!
  2. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Gr8 opportunity to learn deeper communication skills and how to balance your expectations - if you are partners, you need to know what you're partnering, and she does too! Ask her what her expectations are for the relationship, that will be a guide if you want to meet them etc. Good luck!
  3. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    Jealousy and feeling protective is normal, but you've got to try to avoid feeling excessively jealous and protective, because that can be seen as controlling and it will drive people away. My guess is that you're just afraid of losing her, and I can relate to that... maybe a self esteem issue? Fear of abandonment? Something like that. You're not crazy, a lot of people have that issue... I used to be pretty bad when it comes to jealousy... it is something you need to work on, to try to relax and trust her and trust that she is going to be okay. It's good that you recognize that you have this issue, though, because that's the first step to being able to correct it. A lot of people don't even realize what they're doing wrong and then they're left wondering why they drive people away. It sounds like you care a lot about her and don't want to lose her, and that's great, but like I said - try to relax and have some faith that things will be okay. If something she says about another guy bothers you, tell her that it bothers you. If she still does it anyway, then she is the one who is being inconsiderate of your feelings, and that's not healthy for a relationship either. Like urPrecious says, a relationship is supposed to be a balance of both partners' needs.
  4. synchrohobbit

    synchrohobbit Active Member

    If my girlfriend came to me and told me her boyfriend was acting like this, I would immediately advise her to cut it off. Here's why: these are classic signs of a controlling individual that has the potential to escalate to abuse. It doesn't matter if you would "never" do this; that is impossible to know. What is going to happen if she does break up with you because one of her friends gives that advice? Trust is the FOUNDATION of any relationship. It sounds like your own insecurities are being projected, and you are putting her on a pedestal. If this is the case you will also be sorely disappointed when she does something you don't like, or you find flaws. You aren't truly in love unless you can accept a person for those things, and two months is usually not long enough for that.