Am I justified or just over thinking everything?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Still_Life, Jan 29, 2015.

  1. Still_Life

    Still_Life Member

    You know I try and focus and really understand what continuously runs through my mind. These negative thoughts really came to be when I was laid off a couple years back. I was heavily drinking for a while but put that to an end. I felt defeated. It's not that I come from a dysfunctional family or that I'm treated poorly which really gets me I live a relatively normal life, But ever since that moment after three years of school and embracing my field of study and then to be told NO. It wasn't until recently that I had considered the "unfortunate" way out. I really started to look at my life and truly started to think that I am nothing and start to contemplate if whether or not I should be here. Back in June one of my closest friends passed away, I considered this individual a brother and at that point is when I felt that I was done. So many days I said screw it I'm done luckily most times I can throw on my music and really get out of that mindset but it always comes back. I feel bad at times because I will hear the stories of other individuals who are clearly going through worse situations that me and I think Wow I am truly selfish. Am I over thinking? Am I justified? I feel stuck you know
  2. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi, I'm glad you posted here. Over-thinking scenarios does not help as it causes you more anguish. You must not think you are selfish but just a human being with emotional needs.

    You are important and deserve to live life. I am sorry for your loss as that it difficult to cope with as well. You need to stay strong for yourself. The drinking also causes you to feel more emotional and thats understandable.

    You need to think if you can find an alternative career as please do not think you have wasted your time. One person or body saying "No" to you is wrong without any reasoning. You have worked hard and need to be rewarded for your efforts. Yes, the combinations of events has caused you to feel low but YOU can overcome this.

    Please remain calm and perhaps speak to a therapist about the situation. At the moment you are low but everyone gets like that. So keep posting for support and care. YOU ARE IMPORTANT...
  3. Dewonderland

    Dewonderland Well-Known Member

    Hello Still_life,

    This is a nice name you chose.
    It reminds me a picture of a plant growing through the concrete.


    I think that is what it is now.
    You are a nice plant trying to spread your leaves to the sun.
    But there is someone stupid, who probably doesn't have any respect for life ... or without any bad intentions but just thought that what he was doing whas what had to be done ... and the jerk... ahem I mean, the guy just spread concrete all over your head (and probably all over the head of a lot of other plants)

    You might not be able to grow straight to the sun, you might not be able to go out where you had plan to (though you might be able to do even that) but that doesn't mean you can't reach the light !

    You're not selfish thinking of you.
    You are inside your body, inside you life ... you have to first start to be able to stand up.
    There is no need to compare (or only if it helps you).
    But anyway it's not a contest to know who is the one with the more mess in his life.
    Anyway we are all different and we can't cope with the same things.

    Don't think it's unimportant.
    You are INDEED important. You have to care for yourself, you have to care for your dream.
    You have the right to have hope, dream.
    But anyway you'll end up where you need to be.

    Stay here, stay safe.
    I am probably not the best personn to give advice on to how organize a life because I have trouble myself but what I can say today, to you is :

    You are like that flower ... we all want to see those green leaves break the concrete !
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 29, 2015
  4. Still_Life

    Still_Life Member

    Thanks guys. That is indeed some pretty inspirational stuff. I'm going to for sure try to keep my mindset in a more positive direction. I have actually always been know by people to be a pretty positive person. But I think the down fall would be not letting any anger or frustrations out when something bothers me. I tend to bottle things up you know. Then when I'm at home alone is when I am angry you know. Like my buddy passing away back in the summer. Then almost 3 years ago now another friend who was in the military he took his life and I have the habit of keeping my mouth shut and avoiding hard emotional situations
  5. Dewonderland

    Dewonderland Well-Known Member

    If you need to talk, if you feel lost there will always be people there.

    I don't have any world to soothe away the pain when you loose someone.

    Don't keep it foryourself.
    It might not be enough but let it out.

    your are not alone. People here will listen and understand.

    Just hold on.