Am I not allowed to have feelings?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Witty_Sarcasm, Mar 8, 2016.

  1. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    I don't understand why people judge me without even getting to know me. People are supportive and kind here, but there are many places where I am rejected. I use some form of the word sarcastic in a lot of my screen names on sites, so people think I never get hurt. I am sensitive but I have dealt with pain by using humor. I have done this for most of my life. But then people assume that nothing should ever get to me, even when people insult me, because I can come back with a snappy comeback. If I wasn't able to laugh and make jokes, I would have been gone a long time ago. Yes, sometimes I can't cope, and I need to let my feelings out. But when I am judged, that makes it even harder for me to open up. Yes, I use humor as a coping mechanism, but that doesn't make me a cold and unfeeling bitch. I'm just tired of having to explain myself just by not being happy all of the time.
     
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  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    *hugs* I am sorry people judge you. Being sarcastic at times doesn't mean you are made of steel and people need to remember that. I know you are a good person and so do lots of others on here,we will never judge you. You have a kind heart and that's all we care about <3
     
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  3. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    Thank you, your words mean so much to me :) I guess people expect me to always be strong. Sometimes I can joke or smile even when depressed, but it doesn't mean I'm never hurting and I should be able to express my feelings without unfair judgement.
     
  4. BBM77

    BBM77 Active Member

    Everyone is entitled to have emotions and feelings, you are of no exception to this. We find ways to cope with the weight on our shoulders every day and you're doing what you can to remedy what you consider your weaknesses. What people don't realize is that some of us like that who use these mechanisms to cope with things. Don't stop to think that we do get hurt, it's just that we care enough about others so much that we don't simply allow to let others see it. I think it is rather inconsiderate that people tell you that nothing should get to you and that they're under the assumption that nothing can affect you.

    I can relate and on the flip side of things, I think it is rather cold and unfeeling for people to think otherwise. Honestly I think some people out there legitimately be an ass mostly as their coping mechanism, to feel better when trumping over others. Not right.
     
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  5. AdamTide

    AdamTide Well-Known Member

    The important thing is that you get it OUT. All your emotions and feelings. You are allowed to deal with pain in your own way. You sound like the kind of person who makes others feel good about themselves. Keep on being YOU.
     
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  6. Thauoy

    Thauoy Well-Known Member

    I totally agree with what "AdamTide' is saying . You seem to be a very kind and loving person.
    Please be open and keep on being YOU. Just don't care or ignore those who judge you even without trying to know you.
    I have heard that those people who judge other people are those who have their own insecurities in life.

    Best Wishes.
     
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  7. AdamTide

    AdamTide Well-Known Member

    See all the support you are getting on here ? :)
     
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  8. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    Yeah, I mean...maybe they think I can handle every thing that comes my way with ease, but I just can't. I am sick of people assuming that everything is fine with me all the time, or that I always have to be happy. I have a range of emotions, just like anyone else, and I should be free to talk about things that are on my mind.
     
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  9. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    Thank you :) I do try my best to help others, but when people are disrespectful towards me, that can hurt. I wouldn't treat them that way so I wish they would show me the same kindness.
     
  10. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    Thank you, I appreciate your kind words :) I just need to try and block out the negativity and just focus on those who care.
     
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  11. AdamTide

    AdamTide Well-Known Member

    Shaggy sings "who's gonna have your back when it's all done" And you're right, you should distance yourself from negative people. They don't matter and will only bring you down. You are a good person who deserves happiness and don't let anybody make you feel otherwise.
     
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  12. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    Thank you, I will keep your great advice in mind the next time I feel down.
     
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  13. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    Often the ones who smiles widest and laughs loudest are people who are the saddest. Being sarcastic is a coping mechanism and I bet it has helped you keep a distance from those scary feelings.
    You are absolutely allowed to have feelings though, you are entitled to have bad days and be the 'weak one'.
    You're such a lovely person, and you deserve support, and as AdamTide mentioned, look at the replies in this thread. People care about you hun!

    *hugs*
     
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  14. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    Thank you, I wish I felt the same about myself. I think I am going to keep burying my feelings until I no longer feel anything, because it is just easier that way.
     
  15. AdamTide

    AdamTide Well-Known Member

    Lady is exactly right as usual. A bad or weak day does NOT make you a weak person. Heck what you are doing here by reaching out for help takes STRENGTH. It shows you haven't given up. And you don't have to bury your feelings. That would probably make things worse. You can get your feelings and emotions out in a variety of ways. You can write or sing or color or drive around or sit in a scenic, peaceful location. Not to mention, CRYING is a great release. It doesn't mean you are weak or anything. And who knows, maybe someday you will help others who face the same struggles you do. Just do your best and that'll help you feel better about yourself. We're here if you need us. Feel free to PM either one of us at anytime.
     
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  16. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    I just feel like a loser and a failure. I will try my best to distract myself and conquer these bad feelings.
     
  17. AdamTide

    AdamTide Well-Known Member

    You are not a loser. You haven't given up and that makes you stronger than you realize. You have GOOD to offer. Try to relax as much as you can. Think about what you want out of life. You CAN accomplish it.
     
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  18. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    You are NOT a loser of a failure, it is very okay to have feelings, in fact it is necessary. Bottling emotions only makes it worse.
    You are a lot stronger than you know. Keep reaching out, keep sharing.

    Like Adam said, you can always PM us! Don't be alone, and don't give up!
     
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  19. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    Thank you very much :) I will keep going because I know things can always get better. No matter what life throws my way, I have to remember it is just a temporary setback.
     
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  20. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    That is EXACTLY what I like to hear, hun!
     
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