Am I really that sad?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by UnsureCutter, Nov 5, 2008.

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  1. UnsureCutter

    UnsureCutter New Member

    I'm not 100% sure if I am "depressed." I was searching google to see what depression actually is. I mean my life isn't horrible.

    My parents got divorced, then my mom started dating. She lied and told me that her "bf" was just staying till he found a new appartment or something. Bull. Well, he hates my sister and I and my mother doesn't care. As long as she has him. I begged my dad to let me stay with him. That was a bust. He works 12 hours a day 4/7 days a week. He always likes to sleep and I don't like sitting around doing nothing. So I left and asked my grandparents if I could stay with them. Thats when the real problems began. I found out that my mom was going to have a baby and it was going to be a boy. I felt like I was being replaced. 1. She never talks to me or shows that she cares or tells me she loves me. 2. She ignores me AND my sister. 3. She made me depressed and is also making my sister more and more depressed. I gave up in school. I put on a fake face like im always happy and I seem to fool others. I'm always depressed and I tried to hang myself and cut myself but I always chicken out. I recently read some disturbing things about what happens to you when you die and that really made me not want to commit suicide. Sorry if this is getting long but I...I just really don't want to hurt anymore. I alienated myself from everyone I love and I think its killing my grandparents. I just want to end this pain. Can anyone help me?:sad:
     
  2. Robin

    Robin Guest

    Hey, and welcome to the site :) Unfortunately this site offers no solutions but it does offer a whole lot of support to many :) The divorce of my parents affected me deeply as a child and you can never tell what minors will take into adulthood with them. Usually what helps them cope at the time, unfortunately, those coping mechanisms begin to hinder more than help and you find yourself stuck in a trap of misery if it happens to you.

    The best words I can offer to you is get seen to professionally, it can't hurt can it? Though I can't promise it won't be difficult :hug:
     
  3. UnsureCutter

    UnsureCutter New Member

    Thanks. Ive yet to see any professionals. I'm not very keen on talking to people about my problems face-to-face. One of the reasons why i'm on this site. :wink: Well yeah, It's just nice to see people actually care.
     
  4. Robin

    Robin Guest

    Well, most people will only talk when and how they are ready, just do yourself a favour and don't leave it till you're 30 like I did, am still picking up the pieces 8 years later.
     
  5. snowraven

    snowraven Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forum. Sometimes it's easier to talk when you are not sitting infront of another person so you may find it more comfortable chatting here. People here tend to be more understanding as well because we are all in the same boat. Pm me anytime if you feel it may be of help. However like Robin says it would be a good idea to seek proffessional help as well. I too left it for years and tried struggling by on my own thinking that I was just feeling fed up because of the situation I was in. Coming to the forum has been a great help for me and I have found a lot of support here but Depression is an illness like any other and you should talk to your doctor as well. Hope you find what you are looking for here onthe site. Good luck.:smile:
     
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