Am scared that I won't make it...

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by KyleKW, Jun 12, 2007.

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  1. KyleKW

    KyleKW Well-Known Member

    I really feel like I've sunk to a new, very low place. My body is shutting down, I just feel it. It doesn't let me sleep, eat, and I am even having problems like nose bleeds (which I never had before). I've been trying hard to recover from recent events. Last night I knocked myself out with sleeping pills so that I wouldn't do anything drastic... feared that past midnight and I'd probably put my 'plan' into action. I slept for almost seven hours, woke up feeling safe and comfortable, then broke into tears.

    I am desperate now, in crisis even, really HONESTLY not sure if I can get myself to this point tomorrow. I've already reached out to everyone, friends family and strangers, but no luck. I don't want to say 'suicidal' to them because they'll 'Baker Act' me and I'll end up in a hospital with happy drugs in my system. I am not crazy, just very alone and sad and tired.

    Thought our bodies naturally faught for self-preservation but mine is giving up on me regardless. I don't want to die, not now, am only 35 and could have a long life... even happy. I am ready to go but I know that I don't want to. What do I do know, right now???
     
  2. Cybrsk8r

    Cybrsk8r Well-Known Member

    Kyle,

    I'm kind of in the same place as you. I sleep, but only because I take pills to knock me out. I walk around in a fog because the sleep I get is so poor. All I can tell you is to take things one day at a time. Do something to occupy your mind. Try not to dwell on the bad feelings. They have a way of feeding on themselves. And don't sit there thinking no one cares, because I do. Send me a PM anytime.

    Eric
     
  3. ace

    ace Well-Known Member



    Kyle maybe it would be good if you can go to a Hospital given how bad you seem,I know you may not wan't to go there but at least you will be safe mate.
     
  4. -Deception-

    -Deception- Well-Known Member

    Kyle, I think I have to second Ace. Visiting the hospital might not be such a bad idea here. Don't face death unprepared and as a result of an emotional meltdown/crisis. Face it with calm and cool, and that's not what you're feeling right now.

    This feels really urgent, so I'll repost what I wrote to you in your other thread:

    There are two types of suicidal people. Those who want to live, but find the obstacles of life too difficult to overcome and thus are forced to commit suicide. And then there are those who want to die because they've experienced the agony of life, and after that concluded that death is something natural; something to be embraced to rid themselves of the agony soon rather than late. You obviously belong to the first category. Therefore, do think twice before you do anything. I know things are so incredibly shitty for you right now, but your decision will be final - there are no second chances when dealing with death.

    If you decide to live through the night, I say good luck. And if you decide to end it all, I send my thoughts and wishes to you.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 12, 2007
  5. jcat

    jcat Staff Alumni

    kyle, i care. i am here to help you any way i can. all you need to do is ask. pm or msn anytime. please be safe
     
  6. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Kyle, It is time for you to go where you can get the help you need to stay safe. You may not have the desire to do this, but it is for the best. We all would like to see you safe and well cared for. Don't give up. You can make it through this bumpy spot in the road of life. Take care Kyle. :hug:
     
  7. DownwardSpiral

    DownwardSpiral Well-Known Member

    Has anybody heard from Kyle? He is not responding to PM or Email. I have not heard from him since Saturday.

    Kyle - I hope and pray that you are alright and that you got the help you need.
     
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