Amazingly Simple Home Remedies

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by neverdie, Aug 30, 2007.

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  1. neverdie

    neverdie Guest

    1. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze
    button.

    2. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

    3. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

    4. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.

    5. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

    6. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache.

    Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:

    You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

    Remember:
    * Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
    * Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.
    * If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get another chance.
    And finally, be really nice to your family and friends; you never know when you might need them to empty your bedpan.
     
  2. Right U R Ken

    Right U R Ken Well-Known Member

    Except for the laxative, mouse trap, sink, cut a vein, and toothache ones, I might have to try those.
     
  3. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    :laugh: :laugh:

    thank you again! :laugh:
     
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