I thought I knew what depression felt like, but apparently, there are "neat" new tricks around every corner. Recently, I've been reclusive--feeling lonely, but wanting to be alone, not wanting to see anyone. This is curious, because usually, I'm very verbal about how I'm feeling. I have aboslutely no motivation. I feel like I am a terrible person who has driven all her friends away because she talks too much about emotions (I was called "hard to deal with" for being high strung), and I feel like even if I COULD talk to my friends, they wouldn't understand me...they never really have. Oh, and the holidays are coming...I hate the holidays. I sleep ALL the time and I cannot find a point in ANYTHING. Sounds pretty routine, huh? Well, to be honest, depression for me was always a sad affair...something of deep despair. This time, I'm void of most emotion and can't see a reason in anything. It's a very strange feeling floating around in oblivion--like there's no difference between existing and non existance. Sorry for the absurdly boring entry, but I've come to realize that depression wears many masks--has many faces. But just like every other time I've been depressed, I just want to get better soon.