And now I can even visit her! Can someone please tell me why I deserve this?

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by cayzira, Jun 15, 2008.

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  1. cayzira

    cayzira Well-Known Member

    Seriosly... I've done everything I can to help her, I know that, and I hope that she knows that:I stayed up with her on the phone on countless nights, and nearly lost my job several times. I took her stash of meds off her. I kicked in the door when she locked herself in the bathroom. I went to Bangor at 2 in the morning. I dressed her wounds. I got her to tell CAMHs. I spent every bit of cash I had on visiting her.

    What did they do? They discharged her too early. For 6 months I've been doing their job. So why the fuck am I not allowed to visit her?

    The staff in the other ward let me visit, so why won't cheadle? I know I'm an ex patient, but that shouldent matter: Donna used to visit people all the time, hell she was allowed on the ward.. I just wanna be let in the visiting room to see her, but they can't even do that.

    I've done everything I can for her, I promised her that things were going to get better. Is this their idea of better? I love her, and I'm pretty sure she loves me.

    She was crying like hell when she told me, is that what they wanted? Why do I deserve this? What the hell have I done wrong?

    It's my birthday tomorrow, I should be happy, not on the edge of suicide again : (
  2. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Wow I am so sorry.
    Know that you can make it through this.

    So she is in the ward right now?
    I hope that she is ok, and I hope that you are ok. I'm sure you're verry worried about her, make sure that you are ok though too. Sounds like you could use someone there for you like you've been there for her :hug:
  3. cayzira

    cayzira Well-Known Member

    She's in now. She went in Thursday before last, but was in the adult ward in Bangor, on Sunday she was moved to a unit in Manchester. The people there were nice and let me visit as much as I could, they let us sit outside (On our own!!!) so we could have a smoke whenever we felt like it, instead of asking.

    In the ward she's in now, she's locked in 24/7, and is only allowed out once a day for 5mins to have a smoke, and I can't go see her. I was a patient there myself last year... so I know all the security is for a reason, but it been taken too far. It's not what she needs right now. I just don't understand, why I (Someone whos done a hell of a lot more for her then they have, and someone who actually genuenly cares about her, as opposed to someone pretending to care so tht they can get paid!) can't visit her.

    "Sounds like you could use someone there for you like you've been there for her"

    Pretty much. I used to share this kinda stuff with her, but I don't wanna make things any harder for her right now... last thing she needs is to be worying about me. I know I'll get throught this, I kinda have too for her, but I'm worried just how bad I'ts gonna get.

    I just don't know what I'm supposed to do to help her, now that I can't even see her.
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