and so this is it

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by sethwalters88, Mar 2, 2010.

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  1. sethwalters88

    sethwalters88 Active Member

    I'm so sick of everything.
    I'm going to call the police and since I can't do it myself I'm going to get them to do it for me
     
  2. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forum Seth.
    Do you want to talk about what is bothering you? :hug:
     
  3. sethwalters88

    sethwalters88 Active Member

    I've been on the forum a day or so and talking won't help at this point its gone long enough.
    Good luck to everyone on this forum. And good bye I've made up my mind.
     
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hey..hey don't! C'mon talk to us, what's going on? Talking won't hurt!
     
  5. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    Please call for help! dont do it. :sad: talking does help. you can PM me if you like
     
  6. sethwalters88

    sethwalters88 Active Member

    Talking only makes it worse or just gets me through another horrible day. The pain is just to much at this point I just don't wanna be here and I'm sick of everything.
     
  7. kote

    kote Account Closed

    agreed!!!

    at least stay around a while and get to know some of the members here. you will find that your experiences help others as does your anger!!! we all feel shitty too, but everyone helps each other.
     
  8. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    i know it seems like all it lost right now. what about your family? what happens when they find out? help us understand what is wrong in your life
     
  9. sethwalters88

    sethwalters88 Active Member

    I just self harmed I dunno
    What to do anymore. Its like I'm at a dead end and there's no turnin back
    I haven't been on anti depressents for so long and this past year has been hell and I just want it to end
     
  10. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    have you thought about going back on the meds?
    alot of people might say self harming is a bad thing and im not saying it isnt but im also not going to tell you to stop or keep doing it.
    for me, self harm is my release when it feels like dying is the only way.
     
  11. sethwalters88

    sethwalters88 Active Member

    I started in 7th grade and quit in 8th and now I'm 17 and just started again it seems the only way to calm down I sometimes hope that I will bleed to death tho I'm bleeding now still from my arms and legs. I don't like the meds I hate the meds.
     
  12. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    can you please give the meds another go?...
    if it wasn't for my meds I wouldn't be here...they make life bearable..
    I hope you will try and get help......
    stay and talk here....it may help....
    if you are angry then go ahead and vent here....we don't mind....
     
  13. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hey seth, you got msn? Add me if you feel like talking

    I will listen :hug:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 28, 2010
  14. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    IV is right, its good to vent. it lets it all out. also about the meds. if it wasnt for my meds, i doubt id be here either. im sure a lot of people on here would say the same
     
  15. sethwalters88

    sethwalters88 Active Member

    Even if I do get the meds where am I going in life?? I have a criminal record I was kicked out of school my second year of 9th grade I don't have a car or a job nor will anyone hire me. My mom is a coke head she left me and my brother with my dad and could give two shits if I lived or died all she cares about is drugs. My dad is 54 years old and barely able to keep the bills paid. Everyone that I used to know no longer talks or hangs with me because I was on drugs really bad a while back everything I get around I fuck up and I'm to stupid to do anything so its either kill myself now or die on the streets later with no money to my name
     
  16. sethwalters88

    sethwalters88 Active Member

    And as far as the meds go I was on some form of add medicine and anti depressants since the age of 6 and I quit them both at 15 cold turkey because my doctor would give me anymore because I was caught selling my adderall at school
     
  17. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    im sorry you have had to go through all of this at such a young age. keep talking :smile:
     
  18. sethwalters88

    sethwalters88 Active Member

    My thoughts of suicide have increased in the passed 8 1/2 months because I've been sober I was using drugs and alcohol to fix my problems snorting smoking whatever I could do and now that I don't have that I have nothing. I'm a sober suicidal highschool drop out fuck up from the south that will never have a job to support myself muchless a family and never have friends because I push everyone away. To bad my dad has a lock on his guns because right now would be the best time to put one between my eyes.
     
  19. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    well done for staying sober for this long. your doing well :smile:
    in my opinion, this is affects from not taking the drugs and alcohol. i think this is the first hurdle, once you can get passed, needing the drugs and needing the alcohol, you can start rebuilding your life. you are still very young. dont think so far in the future. think about today only, and how your goiing to manage today.
     
  20. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    sounds like you've had a rough life but as long as you're here you can still try to make changes...
    are you living with your Dad?..is he ok for you to stay?
    maybe try a new doctor and get some up to date meds and give them a go...have you tried therapy?....nothing to lose if you are planning suicide anyway....please try some help before you go ahead and hurt yourself...
    give yourself credit for getting off the drugs ...that shows strength and determination..
    I agree with Sam about just taking it day by day.....
     
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