I had an automobile accident yesterday and I'm still unsure how I got out of the car. I didn't even see the other car that ran a red light and I had no chance in avoiding this. My car was completely totaled. I wasn't hurt, only a scrap on the knee and my face from the air bag. I was alone in the car. I still have no idea how I got out of the car. Both police and paramedic told me that it was a miracle that I'm alive. After seeing my car, I too, don't know why I'm still here. I've been severely depressed for months and attempted suicide twice. I haven't been able to control the pain from surgeries one year ago. I just want the pain, the bills and hospitals to stop. I just don't want it anymore. The night of the accident I didn't sleep and my mind couldn't stop thinking why I'm still alive. I haven't told anyone that I'm angry to be living. I'm sorry for those who lost someone in an accident, but I really would be better off dead. It would have stopped all the crap in my life.