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anniversary

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#1
three years ago sometime this week, embarked my depression.

i continue to live with it.
every morning, waking up to a new and sad, day, thinking when i will die.

i've been thinking about dying a lot lately, creating visuals in my head,
jumping out of a moving car on a highway, feeling the shivers down my spine as i look down from a high building/ledge, the pain of my wrist as i slowly cut it, or the dizziness from the pills.

sigh.
 
#2
Battling depression is one of the toughest fights we face. I have never marked the anniversary of it. Guess that may be because I don't know when it came. I do know that some days are better than others. If we can learn to hold on to the better days and try to see what made the difference, a relief can be found. It may be only momentarily, but any is welcome. If you can, try to change your thinking. So hard to do I know. When the bad thoughts come, do your best to replace them. I have been working through a book called Mind over Mood. Some of the ideas have helped. Keep fighting hun. You can get through this. Take care and stay safe. :hug:
 
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