Anonymous Valentine...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by cloud9, Jan 29, 2010.

  1. cloud9

    cloud9 Well-Known Member

    I was thinking of sending someone I liked an anonymous valentine. Just wanted to hear your thoughts on what you think about this approach? I really don't have the courage to tell her, but want to express my feelings in some way. I still haven't figured out how I plan on having her stumble upon it. I really don't have any close friends I can trust to pass it on to her.

    Do you think sending a valentine like this is simply a waste of my time?
     
  2. NoGood

    NoGood Well-Known Member

    I think its a nice idea but i know if someone sent me a anon valentines i would think it was someone playing a horrible joke on me and it could back fire so just be careful. Your intensions are nice though which is good but it may not get the desired results.
     
  3. Vangelis

    Vangelis Well-Known Member

    I would send a series of anonymous valentines all giving away clues, and then on V-day, present her with something better than the first and reveal that you are her secret admirer.
     
  4. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    If you want to express your feelings for her in some way but don't have the courage to tell her yourself I'm not sure an anonymous valentine is the way to go. After all it is anonymous, and she won't really know that it was you who sent it. If you want to though and feel it'd help you feel a bit better, then by all means go for it. Might be an idea to just leave it on her desk before class or in her locker if she has one (though I always wondered how they did that since they don't have a key to open it?) or something like that. Just be careful that she doesn't recognise your handwriting or anything if you don't want her to know you sent it. A friend of mine sent me an 'anonymous' valentine once, thinking I'd never guess who it was from, but the problem was he has such horrendously awful handwriting that I recognised it as from him right away. Then when our other friend told me it was from him, he got funny because he thought I hadn't figured it out!!

    Good luck with whatever you decide to do, and be sure to let us know how it goes. :smile:
     
  5. Ziggy

    Ziggy Antiquitie's Friend

    Anonymous Valentine? Jeez, if I ever spend money on a woman she's going to know about it... I'm not wasting money on no one.

    Seriously though, you do the anonymous stuff and she'll think your best mate sent it, and everything then gets seriously messed up. Subtlety never works. (I'm very cynical - ignore anything I say)
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 30, 2010
  6. cloud9

    cloud9 Well-Known Member

    wow the best mate thing.....really hope it doesn't go down that way lol.
     
  7. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    It feels nice to get things anonymously-- provided you have an ounce of self confidence and aren't paranoid that it's a horrible joke and people are around the corner laughing at you...
    Ummm... if I were more confident in myself- I would find it a very sweet gesture. It's romantic~ I say go for it!
     
  8. Rayne

    Rayne Well-Known Member

    Hm.. I think it depends how you do it. I remember a few years ago, someone gave a very long, annonymous letter to a friend of mine on valentines. Unfortunately, it seemed a little.. creepy, because she'd only spoken to him once or twice. It was just excessive. When he came forward and told her it was from him, she was too freaked out to give him a chance.
     
  9. cloud9

    cloud9 Well-Known Member

    The good thing is I know her fairly well so its definitely not coming from someone she doesn't know well.
     
  10. Rayne

    Rayne Well-Known Member

    Oh, then go for it. Its pretty cute if its from someone you know x)
    Just out of interest, how old are you? Still in school or..?
     
  11. cloud9

    cloud9 Well-Known Member

    lol hopefully this doesn't seem too sad. I'm twenty one and in my final year of university.
     
  12. Tray

    Tray Well-Known Member

    sounds like a good idea. Send a couple letters. see if shes interested or not. whats to lose?
     
  13. Rayne

    Rayne Well-Known Member

    I don't think its sad actually, its quite a cute thing to do.
     
  14. cloud9

    cloud9 Well-Known Member

    Sooooooo I did it.

    I sent the anonymous valentine out.....on Wednesday. Wednesday was really the only opportune moment. I couldn't deliver it on Valentine's Day. I had a friend of mine get one of his friends to deliver it to her. I handmade the card with a bit of a cheeky poem. Included a teddy bear and some chocolates. All of it was in a gift bag of course.

    I was told she felt a bit surprised she was getting one. She even asked to make sure if it was for her. Of course for the next little while it was quite the topic among all my friends. Its funny because they really couldn't figure out who it was. The first thought was the it was some prank so they assumed it was either me or two of my other friends. Of course we all denied responsibility for the prank.

    The next day we had a birthday lunch. She passed the card around as people were curious. I took a look to and acted dumbfounded. I'm really not comfortable opening up about it......yet I guess. She sort of thanked whoever gave it to her quietly. I was sitting at the table. There were about 8 of us on that particular table. I dunno. She really didn't seem all that curious about who sent it. At least it made her smile I guess.

    Another girl commented on how she thought the guy was being a pussy for not being up front. That didn't make me feel too good.

    I really don't know what my next plan of action should be. I really enjoyed putting the gift and card together. Making the card actually took me my Saturday from buying the materials, figuring out what to write in the card and then making it.

    Yea never thought I'd have the guts to do something like this...
     
  15. CAD

    CAD Well-Known Member

    Hi mate, just wanted to say well done. Are you going to reveal yourself as her secret admirer?
     
  16. cloud9

    cloud9 Well-Known Member

    The truth is I really want to tell her....but before I did I thought I should ask two of my close friends for advice about this first. The problem is that next time I'm back in university, I'll be here for a full year. I'll be living with a group of friends, including my Valentine. If I told her I sent her the Valentine, she may feel really awkward about it all. As my friend put it, when I live with her I wouldn't want this "pink elephant" to be in the house with me. I'm not even sure how all our close friends would react about this. I don't think they expect this kind of.... "behaviour" from me.

    Yea its sort of been killing me keeping quiet about it. I think about it all the time. Realistically though, and I am a bit of a realist, I don't think I really stood a chance with this girl. Sending the gift might have been a wasted effort although I did enjoy the process a lot. I don't get vibes from her as to whether she'd be interested. Sometimes she can be really friendly toward me, other times she's not, almost ignoring me. I don't know she seems more comfortable around her girlfriends. We used to be more playful last term poking and tickling each other sometimes after classes. We'd cake each other at bday parties. But yea I don't know maybe she lost interest or maybe there wasn't any to begin with. We normally texted each other frequently but not so much in the last two weeks. I'm not sure if its cause we're busy or what. Its just a shame that I'm still crazy about her. Sometimes I wonder if I spend more time thinking about university or her. When I procrastinate she's all I think about..........*sigh*
     
  17. Rayne

    Rayne Well-Known Member

    Sounds like someone was jealous to be honest.. :laugh:

    Could you maybe tell her in private? She sounds like a nice person but if she doesn't feel the same way about you, is it likely that she'll spread it around or will she just let it be?
     
  18. cloud9

    cloud9 Well-Known Member

    ummm.....i'm not sure if I can open up to her about it. I don't think she'd spread it, but she'd definitely tell her close friends which is normal right? Problem is those friends are probably everyone I would hope not to know. Strange....I know. That's what happens when everyone is in a small program and knows each other pretty well. I'm just sort of known to be the type of guy who isn't open about things like this. People know I've never dated and that my religion has a large part to play in it. I don't know what people will think or what people will say. It worries me. Other friends in my program who liked someone or the other, when word got out the gossip that went around made me uneasy. I'd hate to think that I'd be the subject of meaty gossip. Bah what would people say?

    Anyways I figure living with her will make things awkward if she doesn't like me which I'm sure she doesn't. Why make things worse by coming out of the closet on this?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 16, 2010
  19. CAD

    CAD Well-Known Member

    Hmm, I think you tell her how you feel and get it out of your system. If she says she's not interested, you can always laugh it off/shrug it off with good humour (may involve some acting!) and ask her to still be friends with you. She will probably want to laugh it off with you too so as not to create tension. And you can always expressly ask her to keep it a secret: confide in her as a friend what you have told us here. Say you are extremely worried about becoming the subject of gossip, and please could you keep it a private affair between yourself and her. That's reasonable enough.

    Or, of course, she might tell you she's interested. In which case it's happy days, right?
     
  20. mcviking

    mcviking Well-Known Member

    Just tell her. But don't spill all the beans. It will eat you more up if you entertain all these fantasies and desire only to be shot down. But if you get shot down and nothing comes of it you will be over it in about a week.