Another hard crash

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by unionfalls, May 5, 2016.

  1. unionfalls

    unionfalls Well-Known Member

    It has been awhile since I have posted. I have recently crashed hard. unsure how to put it. Quit living would be best I suppose. lost job, lost friends, lost home. This has occurred over the course of 4 months. All the while I put up a front of happiness and stability.
    I am shaky and afraid.
    Was released from the hospital about ten hrs ago. (Currently in a safe place) Go back in the morning for my fourth ECT treatment. Spent 2 weeks on the psych ward after I was determined to be a threat/harm to myself. This is now the second time that the police have brought me in. Currently on 4 different meds.
    Feeling very ashamed...unsure if I have the strength to get through this.....very ashamed
  2. MisterBGone

    MisterBGone Well-Known Member

    Don't feel that way. There's nothing wrong with you. So try not to think like that. You're sick, and getting help. We all need a helping hand every once in awhile. So don't worry, about anything, really. Just be calm for now and allow the treatment plan that has been set in place to take effect. That's the best thing you can do.
  3. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    You have nothing to be ashamed of. You've been through a lot, and I think anyone would have crashed after that.

    Are you getting any help to get your affairs sorted? Finding a new place to live etc?

    Please do take care of yourself, take the help you can get, and again, do not be ashamed. I'm proud of you for getting help at the hospital. You deserve to get the help you need!
  4. unionfalls

    unionfalls Well-Known Member

    Thank you Mister B Gone and The Phantom Lady.
    I would have replied sooner but the ECT wiped the memory of my posting this. I had my 6th and final treatment on the 11th of this month. It has taken till today for the return of most of my comprehension. I have a bit to say but I need to form it straight in my mind first. I wanted to, as I feel this gratitude deeply, say Thank You for your kindness and encouragement.
    When I do the boosters, if need be, I have got to make sure to do it as inpatient only. This has been way to hard for my loved ones...I am very fortunate.
  5. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support SF Artist SF Supporter

    Please do t feel embarrassed or ashamed my friend. I'm so glad you are getting help and I'm so sad that you lost what you did because of your illness. Concentrate on getting better and loving yourself, you didn't choose this illness.
    I went into detox a couple weeks ago, because I was addicted to my pain medicine prescription, I know how badly you felt. I felt like I was a failure at life and embarrassed to tell anyone what was going on, now I don't care, I want to help people that suffer like I did and I know you will do the same. Bless you my friend, I have faith you will be well again and better than ever.