Another question.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by ASkylitDrive, Aug 13, 2010.

  1. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    Quite simple really. If you feel like you have to hold certain things back, avoid things about yourself (like hobbies and stuff your partner doesn't like).. do you stay with them?
    I'm just now getting anyway from a fight with my boyfriend. Its stupid really, but for some reason I'm still in tears.
    Its over some stupid video game hobby I have, he keeps lecturing me saying I have better things I can do in my time than video games. I don't see why we even fought about this...thats kinda why Im asking.
     
  2. cult logic

    cult logic Staff Alumni

    They can dislike your hobbies but if they are pushy about it and consistently whiny then no, no point staying with them.

    If they care that much about a hobby they are either controlling or just a douche.
     
  3. Ziggy

    Ziggy Antiquitie's Friend

    But it may be a deeper issue than just the hobby.

    They may feel that you're not spending enough time together.
    They may feel that you're not making the most of your life.
    They may just be controlling.
    I don't know, so there's not much more I can say.
     
  4. stuckinchicago6

    stuckinchicago6 Well-Known Member

    No matter what, you always have to be yourself. It is hard and hurtful when people point out our flaws or that we have bad habits or anything about us that makes us odd. I know how it is to have a BF other criticize you. My own mother constantly points stuff out to me. All I can say is that there are worse habits than playing video games. Maybe if it means that much to him, don't play in front of him. However, I would try and talk about it and remind him that although there are better ways to waste time, there are also worse things you could be doing with your time.

    BTW, you stay with a person because you can see yourself being with them and you genuinely like them. If it gets to a point where you are no longer happy in the relationship, the you can start to question. Other than his complaining, are you comfortable with him?
     
  5. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    Well, thanks for all of the inputs.
    I talked to him about it (in my attempt to be more open)
    He said the reason is because I'm not spending my time wisely, and I could have better things to do. That and his brothers were gamers and he has a pet peeve about it.
    He said he'll back off, but he is still a bit pushy about it. I guess time will tell. I'm sure once school starts back up things wont be so rocky.
     
  6. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    You could try asking him, why does he think he has any say how you spend your time, and why he feels the need to stop you doing what you want?

    There might be reasons why he's doing this- I just suggest talking to him about it, and finding out what they are.

    If it's an issue about control, then yeah- I'd think about leaving...
     
  7. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Video games are addictive and they can cause problems in a relationship. Maybe he feels that you care more about them than him? I dunno, but I would choose the guy over video games any day.
     
  8. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    He knows I choose him over everything. Its so silly. Besides, he has no room to talk since he rather skate with his buddies than talk to me.

    Also, we got into another fight, this time he was saying things like "I don't give a damn about how you feel right now" and "Didn't I just say that? Damn you are dumb"
    So uhm.. Yea not sure what is going on.