Another thread :)

Following on from my introduction in the forum, I thought I'd share my plan and get some feedback. I'm not trying to be emo here, just wouldn't mind some reflective advice.

So now my trip to Tasmania will be in less than a week and for those who aren't up to speed, I was aiming to find xxxxxxx after making the decision that the next world would be less broken than this one. Being the pragmatic creature I am, I've continued to work and do what I need to do day-to-day and paying my rent, etc as I usually would (in the off-chance I get the cobbleys for an unforeseen reason - I'm hoping it's a rich handsome billionaire whose in love with me, hah!)

I just want to know if this would seem to make sense? I feel really odd myself because I keep thinking "Why am I still doing/saying things as if I'm going to continue living beyond this trip?" It is almost like I am on auto-response, because at the same time, I'm thinking of the things I'm going to say to various people in my suicide letter and what I'm leaving behind. Those that I work with will probably say "Wow I had no idea, she didn't act like she was going to commit suicide."

I just feel that when I've seen other friends/patients who were suicidal, it was as if they were shouting through a megaphone, or at least something was off that were the clues that they were going to plan something. I know they say that it is the quiet ones that get away with it successfully but I just wanted to know if its just me and my quirky ways or is it not that uncommon?

 

It sometimes seems as if our subconscious is more powerful than it's given credit for. You are consciously planning something but your subconscious is unaware of this and when it has a hand in things then its planning for a future your consciously intending to avoid.

I hope you find a reason to change your plans. Would you like to talk about your reasoning behind your decision?

 

maybe subconsciously you really don't want to do this?...