I chose to stop taking Effexor 6 months ago, because it created such an intense personality change and generally on-edge feeling that I didn't want to take it any longer. Without it, I'm a very calm, thought-out, and non-aggressive person. On it, I am far more impetuous, aggressive, and violent feeling. I found I would have to restrain my anger toward people, whereas I would normally never get angry about anything at all. On Effexor, I would speed in my car for no good reason. Off of it, I'm wise enough to keep it to the speed limit or maybe 5-over. On Effexor, I'd have psychotic thoughts about the people who "wronged" me. Off of it, those thoughts would never have happened at all. Unfortunately, during this not-being-on-medication-by-choice stint, I had an emotional crash in the last few months that left me feeling hopeless, suicidal, failing a class, and basically in a minimally-functional depressive state. Sometimes surviving is the best I could do. Sometimes I didn't do that well, either. I'm ready to go back on it again... But I'm afraid... I'm afraid I won't be myself... I mean, it works on some level... But I'm afraid... And other pills don't work at all. I tried Zoloft once, and it simply made me worse by 1000 times. Before Zoloft I could function. After Zoloft, I was completely a wreck that couldn't even get out of bed for a month. I feel like I'm better off not taking anything and working through these rough-patches... Yet I'm certainly not my complete self.. I don't know what to do.