I just feel like the death is all around me, that's it's so damn close. I have attempted a few things (once quite recently) but every day for the last 3 months I have thought about it and I can feel death wrapping itself around me. It's so close, that I can almost taste it. I'm afraid, but at the same time I'm excited, I want this all over with. I can't get rid of the darkness, it's smothering me and soon it will take over me completely.