Anyone else live an empty life?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by darkrider, Oct 4, 2009.

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  1. darkrider

    darkrider Well-Known Member

    I don't have a job or go to college or anything like that. I don't really have any friends I can see, and I don't have a girlfriend.

    I guess all I do is try and 'occupy' myself.. guitar, volunteer sometimes, do runs with others, go for walks, photography, talk online etc. But it stinks.. i'm so bored of my life.

    I don't know anyone who lives such a wierd life as me. To make it worse i'm 21. People would probably tell me to grow up. I hope to get a referral and try adderall or some amphetamine. Anti depressants did nothing for me. I need to wake from this slumber somehow. It's like my brain is asleep, or dead (probably).
     
  2. yursomedicated

    yursomedicated Chat & Forum Buddy

    i just feel like i'm an empty body just hanging around. idk what to do about it. have you told anyone you feel like this?
     
  3. LivingOn

    LivingOn Well-Known Member

    I can relate. Now that I'm officially disabled, my life has no clear purpose. The days run into each other. I sleep a lot, rest a lot, and spend some time online. The rest of my time is spent on mundane matters: errands, cleaning and the like. It's a strange existence.
     
  4. bubblin girl

    bubblin girl Well-Known Member

    hi
    im also 21 with no friend,bf or job...im soooooooooo empty.its the hardest feeling ever. i think u doing great, u can only go to myspace, some volunteer, mybe some classes in languges and more sport, cos sport like Anti depressants...anyway if u ifnd friends thats all will be gone.
    take care
     
  5. shefallsasleep

    shefallsasleep Well-Known Member

    Luckily for me I have just started Uni so I have something to occupy my time and mind even if it is a couple of hours a day, but as soon as Im not there y whole time is spent trying to occupy myself, I literally just lie in bed on my laptop with the tv on and thats it. It makes me feel even worse x
     
  6. dostrescuatro

    dostrescuatro Member

    I go to High School and it's basically the only social activity I have. I don't have problems with anybody in particular, but nobody's really my friend. Then I come home and I usually don't do my homework nor do I study. I just play guitar and waste all of my time in my computer.

    I'm considering starting some new activity, though. Maybe it will indirectly lead me to meet new people. Have you tried starting some new activity that you've never done before?

    And then, when you go for walks, you can always invite someone you know. Then you could establish conversations with them, and while you don't have to rush anything, it could help you to make some progress.

    Photography may be a good way to meet new people, too. There are tons of people with the same insterests as you. I'm sure there are cool people in your town that you could get along with.
     
  7. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    I work 2-3 times a week for 4-6 hrs when I go. Most of my time is otherwise spent in bed lately.

    At least you're still out of bed and doing things even if not a lot.
    Give yourself some credit at least :hug:
     
  8. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    My life feels empty a lot of the time. I try to keep busy with something, mostly small stuff. I'm glad I found this forum because I can't talk to the people in my life about it.
     
  9. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    I have such a full plate.

    Family, 2 jobs, church band, AA meetings, sick Mom...you name it.
    I am busy from the time I get up to the time I go to bed, and yet I do feel empty and hollow inside.
     
  10. Ranxerox

    Ranxerox Well-Known Member

    Ja, my life has been pointless for years now, dont really have anything to get up for anymore. I cant get a job and i lack the social skills to make friends so i have no social life.
     
  11. TheBLA

    TheBLA Well-Known Member

    I have the most empty, boring and pathetic life of anyone else here, believe me! I am 22 years old and much of my life has been wasted indoors on the TV or computer, and it still is. I won't even try to get a girlfriend or anything like that, it will just end in failure.

    Your life isn't boring compared to mine darkrider, I wish I could get over my depression and apathy and do the stuff you mentioned like running, photography, etc. I should be doing those things instead of living in my own prison. Your life compared to mine is quite interesting, it depends on who you compare yourself to I suppose. I have nobody inferior to compare myself to make myself feel better, but that's not a good thing to do anyways, to judge others based on their position on a "totem pole".

    Trust me, your life is not at all empty compared to mine, my life is truly, truly empty. And I don't feel like getting out of it either, the apathy and depression keep holding me back.

    This is the reason for my depression, why I fear the rest of my life will be nothing but pain. I feel that I have let my life get so empty and messed up that it can never get better, the effects are permanent so I wonder if I can improve my life and things can get better or if I should just end it now since I have let my life get so stale and moldy that I should just throw it into the trash where it belongs?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 6, 2009
  12. darkrider

    darkrider Well-Known Member

    I think I may have overplayed things slightly.

    With regards to the running.. i hope i can turn up and start doing that on some saturdays, but its only like 1 hour in a whole week. the photography thing.. i simply wonder around the park alone in the day, everyone is in school or at work, so its an equally lonely world.

    i should also mention i have shyness and a degree of social phobia, I get quite nerous around people my age. So whatever activities i do i usually end up quiet and alone, usually.

    Rahul, don't you go to university? At least you have that.. man i wish i did. I usually go to bed around 1am, get up at 12pm, wash, do nothing, bed, repeat... my life doesnt even exist.

    this is going to sound pathetic.. but im close to a couple of people off a forum (i met some on a meet up a while ago), and theres one woman i speak to a lot on msn, and we havent spoken much lately because she busy and I feel so alone and kinda screwed over. ive become depandant on online relationships for goodness sake. im even trying to not talk to her for a few days because i feel too 'easy'. i think im turning crazy. im just alone as always.

    anyway thanks for the replies. having over 10 replies doesnt make me feel quite as lonely, heh.
     
  13. History

    History Well-Known Member

    young man, you are only 21. Try being unemployed at 38 and broke after facing complete business failure with everything gone. 21 is a very young age and you can do many things. you can take your time to look for a job.
     
  14. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    Keep posting then. We got your back :hug:
     
  15. darkrider

    darkrider Well-Known Member

    I guess that is the positive outlook, and of course it feels hard seeing it that way right now. I think I am too depressed to even dream of the 'good life' anymore. I think the person inside me has given up after so long, that's why I go throughout the days feeling empty.

    I think the teenage years and early twenties are the most important period of development of the mind as well as the body, and i've spent the majority of that time alone. It's hard to build yourself up as a person when that person you were was broken a long time ago.
     
  16. Zaparc©

    Zaparc© Active Member

    I live an extremely empty life. I wake up, turn the computer on, and stay there from practically morning until night; only moving to get myself something to eat or drink.

    It's gotten worse over the course of the last couple of years. There were times when I'd go out maybe once or twice a week, but the more I got used to staying in, the more I kept doing it. I'm now afraid of leaving the house, and never do.
     
  17. Datura

    Datura Well-Known Member

    I've lived an empty life most of my existence it seems. I stopped having friends at 13. There have been boyfriends here and there, and I have one now who I happen to live with. I've had mindless jobs in the past, but have been unemployed for over 2 years. I've dropped out of school 3 times. I have no car. My 'life' consists of getting up no earlier than 2pm, going online, and watching tv. I have no motivation to even go for a walk outside.
     
  18. ride26

    ride26 Member

    I'm 21 as well and I have the same feeling of emptiness that you describe. I go to both school and work full time, but I am in debt because of my stupid ass car that I bought 2 years ago. So I roll around in a nice car, but I'm broke as fuck.... extremely pathetic and I hate myself for it. I also pay for school and I have to pay my parents back for money they loaned me last year. I work my ass off for nothing because I still have zero money at the end of the week to do anything fun. It's not good. I wish I could start over and be in the position you are at. And by the way I don't have any friends or a girlfriend either.

    So here is some advice, don't be stupid with money if you already haven't. It will save you a lot of grief. If you buy a car, get the cheapest piece of shit you can. Don't take out any loans for anything either, not even school. They are not worth it.

    We both have plenty of time to get things right. Opportunities will come in our lifetime if we choose to act on them. Probably not tomorrow, because of the shitty economy, but we just have to wait it out. It's hypocritical of me to give this advice because I'd honestly rather be dead so I don't have to deal with this shit, but the time is going to pass either way. I always have the option to kill myself and I certainly will if I am in the same position as I am now in 5 years. And right now that is my only source of motivation to keep living.

    These are the "best years of your life" my motherfucking ass.
     
  19. worlds edge

    worlds edge Well-Known Member

    Do you think you might be ADHD? That's typically what Adderall is used for. I don't think it does much for depression.

    FWIW, I'm carrying a diagnosis of ADHD-PI and take Adderall XR for it. I'd stay away from it, given a choice. It messes up your sleep patterns and in my case has given me an absolutely amazing case of constipation. Oh, and the teeth grinding. Can't forget that. Not a habit I'd ever had, but I started reflexively doing it within a week of going on the stuff.

    But I must admit it seems to have helped me be slightly better organized, either because the medicine works as advertised or because I now spend so much time on the can I can mentally review things with only limited distractions. :tongue:

    Also, not sure what things are like in the UK but in the US it seems to be considered some sort of controlled substance: Prescriptions cannot be automatically renewed, the shrink has to put his DEA code on the scrip or they won't accept it, and I need to show ID both when dropping off the scrip and picking it up. I've never had to go through so many hoops for a medicine before, or go through the SAME hoops every thirty days, like I do with this stuff.
     
  20. darkrider

    darkrider Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the posts here. I'm thinking about you all as I read it I really am. I didn't think there was many on here who felt so alone.

    I went down to the run today but I was late (it was at 9am!), and they had already started a warm up lap, and I was too embarassed to turn the corner and introduce myself and join in (i'm quite shy). Of course this has led to a mini fall out with my parents, walking back to the car alone, and getting told I act like a little child, etc. All of this does nothing but enhance my depression and the feeling of being alone (and totally misunderstood by everyone).

    I know what you mean about money. I've still got my student loan (before dropping out), and extra on top from benefits, so i'm o.k with money. In fact money scares me.

    Oh yes.. "best years of your life". It is for everyone else my age.
     
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