anyone else sick of seeing happy people around them?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by DarkLordVader, Jun 3, 2012.

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  1. DarkLordVader

    DarkLordVader Well-Known Member

    i have about had it with putting a smile on my face while i see everyone else close to me doing so great and looking so happy. WHY am i the loser of the group, my family? WHY am i a fucken drug addict anf a alcoholic and everyone else is sober? WHY do i even exist when there is NOTHING left for me? i am tired of talking, it does NOTHING to make me feel better, i dont see any form of happiness for me and i dont want to be around anymore.
     
  2. Kharma

    Kharma Well-Known Member

    I hear ya. When someone trys to convince me that seeing the glass half-full is the key to life I want to slap them stupid for being so simplistic.

    And yes, I do mean that last word in its most derogatory sense, Mr. or Mrs/Miss Moderator. I am saying the happy-crowd lack a signifigant amount of mental ability and acuity. But please read on before passing judgement.

    Life's moments and events are WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY too complex to compare it to a glass of effing water.

    Of course, that attitude nearly got me suspended when I laughed out loud at my grade ten science teacher (is it possible to laugh sarcastically? That's how I meant it) when he told us you could think of an atom like the solar system. I asked him if he was stoned. Apparently we wern't allowed to talk to teachers that way.

    What saved me was I was right, and could defend my position - the two structures look nothing alike.

    Long story short? It pisses me off that they - the glass-half full crowd - just might be right; and I might be metaphorically blind. Unable to see it. And that's where my anger lies. There is a chance that it might be me who is unable to understand. And given my attitude to others who don't understand.... well, it's my experience that we reflect out what's in.

    (Don'tcha just love a "F_ck Me!," weed-assisted, "AH-HA!" moment?)

    The cure for that? I've no idea. I know what an atom looks like. There is no way I can think of it looking like the solar system. One is a flat pan-cake. One is a buzzing-ball. So I don't know how to imagine a way that you could think of one being similar to the other. Even with a top-down, 2D representation of an atom (my science-teachers arguement), it would still look nothing like the same 2D image of the solar system. The mechanics of the orbits are completely different, to say nothing of the scales involved.

    In the same way, I don't know how I can see the world with hope, when it is so 100% obvious that it deserves none.

    For me - being the perfectionist, all or nothing personality that I am - I can't let go of the "arguement" untill I am sure either they are right, or I am right. It would really suck to do the deed, get to "somewhere" and hear a dissapointed and sorrowful: "Dude!"

    "If you'd waited 'til Tuesday, the answer was there. Now you get to go back and try again."
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 3, 2012
  3. Moat

    Moat Banned Member

    These days I take everything with a grain of salt and have resigned myself to the fact that this is how I am and will always be and simply push on through the day as best I can and not concern myself with what other people think or feel.
     
  4. supermodel

    supermodel Well-Known Member

    Since I've become sick and disabled, I can't even watch commercials with people laughing and having fun. Yes, I know it isn't real, but watching television gives you this uncanny feeling that you're missing out on life.

    Because of my sickness, I have lost the ability to do things that I really enjoy. But I try to keep pushing through this....
     
  5. Blackbird33

    Blackbird33 Well-Known Member

    I don't wish anyone else ill will but it does hurt seeing many of my former classmates happy married starting families. Or just out with friends living life. I've accepted that having a family being in a committed loving relationship just isn't in the cards for me. Though sometimes I day-dreaming about having a family the thoughts always turn to heartache. Besides I don't plan on living to see my next birthday.
     
  6. Autumn01

    Autumn01 Well-Known Member

    I definitely am.
     
  7. Autumn01

    Autumn01 Well-Known Member

    Just about all of my classmates are married, have kids and are lovin' life ect... Blah, Blah, Blah. I can tell from their Facebook.
    I'm not really jealous as I don't personally want kids anyway. I wouldn't mind being married though. But I know getting married isn't even in the cards for me. No guy would fucking want me. Unfortunately I'll be living through 1 more birthday :( as my birthday is just in a matter of days.
    The only place I fit in is being dead.
     
  8. BrinkOfExistence

    BrinkOfExistence Well-Known Member

    I don't have a problem being around happy people, i like seeing happy people, lets me know that the world isn't always so horrible.
     
  9. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    I don't have a problem being around miserable people. I like seeing miserable, wretched people, it lets me know that we're all in the same boat and that life basically sucks and there's someone else suffering as much, if not more, than I am. But if they suffered more, it would certainly help.
     
  10. OutCaste

    OutCaste Well-Known Member

    pretty soon a lot of those happy people wont be all that happy. and im not trying to curse or be negative, but there is some pretty catastrophic things coming humanitys way.

    i take solace in the fact that some of my problems are not even half as bad as whats coming.
     
  11. DarkLordVader

    DarkLordVader Well-Known Member

    i tolerate them when i am under the influence, thats it
     
  12. Kharma

    Kharma Well-Known Member

    I used to love Big Bang Theory. Can't watch it much anymore - at least not without fast-forwarding through the "relationship" parts. I find myself, often out-loud, telling Leonard or Howard or Sheldon they are being stupid. That love isn't real. That she'll promise to be there through thick and thin - then she won't. She'll rip out your heart and crap in the hole (and I was right - Penny did screw Leonard over several times 'cause - like every female - she's never happy with what she's got) and run the other way.

    The one lucky guy in the group, Raj, is too stupid to know he's got it the best - no woman screwing with his emotions. Use 'em for rides, then put 'em in a barn like a horse.
     
  13. Fvantom

    Fvantom Active Member

    yes, I have to see it in facebook posts all the time, constantly having to read about everyones weekend, everyone that I want to be friends with but they never respond....they just treat me like Im some subhuman trash.....
     
  14. red ribbons

    red ribbons Well-Known Member

    Carbie, my family just ignores me and treats me like I don't exist and am not there. It's always been that way. Yes, everybody else seems to be having fun, etc. I've done everything I can to fit in, but I don't belong anywhere. I just feel lost.
     
  15. Richard 007

    Richard 007 Active Member

    I wish I had your strenth ...............
     
  16. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    I just know I will never be a part of that world...I will never be truly happy...so I mostly just keep to myself...
     
  17. 1112222

    1112222 Well-Known Member

    Nope.
     
  18. sudut

    sudut Well-Known Member

    maybe they are not as happy and doing as great as you think. everyone has their own share of troubles.
     
  19. DarkLordVader

    DarkLordVader Well-Known Member

    i can bet $100 they are not depressed and suicidal like i am
     
  20. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni


    Everybody carries around extra baggage, issues and even depression that they don't always display on the surface. Every person has some problems, even those who are very successful and rich (look at the celebrities and music stars to fall into the news relating to this). The way people deal with their issues is what is different from individual to individual. I suffer sadness (depression?) from a great recent loss, but I force myself to be one of those who tries to go through a day smiling. If I do not, then I only bring myself down further. The grass seems always greener for the other guy, but often it really just is not.
     
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