anyone hate their brother

Discussion in 'Domestic Abuse' started by wastedmylife, Oct 12, 2008.

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  1. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    my brother tortured me when I was younger, my life was spent in fear of him and trying to please him, he would tell my parents he wanted something and if he didnt get what he wanted he would hurt me and basically use me as a hostage, my weekends growing up where basically me baracading myself against the door and my brother coming in and hurting me for no reason other then he is a piece of shit

    I think about these things now and I just want to kill him, like I want him dead 6 feet under, I dont want him to have a funeral, I just want him tortured to death

    The last time I prayed for anything was about 4 years ago when my brother and dad were away and I was at home and I prayed to god that they would die in a car crash, but of course there is no god so that didnt happen

    But yea, I hate my brother, he is the source of all my problems, my life has essentially gone into the shit in the 4 or so years since I have finally moved out of my house and I really dont know what to do

    I cant understand how my parents allowed this to go on I hate them so fucking much

    It just doesnt seem fair how my life is over and the source of most of my problems is my brother, he is healthy now and he isnt happy but he is healthy, and I am no longer healthy and I am fucked up, how is he allowed to live and I am allowed to suffer

    is there a point where revenge is needed, I dont understand how these things were allowed to go on and my parents did nothing, he fractured my skull on at least 3 occasions and I think there were other times, I just cant comprehend what has happened to me in my childhood and what has happened to me since my childhood between all the mental things I put my self through and these horrible physical problems I have been dealing with

    I just can not comprehend my life, can not fucking comprehend it

    Do I get revenge on him, do I sue him, do I sue my family?
  2. notwanting2live

    notwanting2live Well-Known Member

    heya x i no what you are kinda going through as i was sexually abused by my brother when i was 7-9 and my mum knows about it but doesnt wanna accept it. whereas sueing him, i dont know if you could. you could get him done for toture and get him banged up for abit. as there should be medical records and stuff bout your fractered skull and stuff.

    i hope you can find peace and tranquilty soon. take care and stay safe hunni x

    Xx Sky xX
  3. minion

    minion Well-Known Member

    When it comes to family it's hard. My family looked the other way when it came to my brother abusing me. He was their favorite, so of course nothing that he did was ever wrong.

    One push and shove too many, and I was gone from my family. So its kinda hard. There have been times were my brother was my best friend and then there are times, when I wanted to cement his shoes...and make him suffer.
    Hello0121 likes this.
  4. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    Good living is the best revenge. Distance yourself from them. Make your own life. My mother dealt with that sort of thing from her sister and parents [quite a bit worse than anything mentioned so far], and now she just doesn't talk to them, and is happy with her existence, other than the PTSD.
  5. Jeremiah

    Jeremiah Active Member

    Yes... My brother has been abusive to me for my entire life. He and my father are the only family I have, and they're basically clones of eachother, and both are abusive.

    I have no idea how many times my brother has seriously hurt me over the course of my life, both physically and emotionally. I don't remember much about what happened when I was really young, but it escalated from the simple fights that siblings have, to nearly sadistic behavior. I've recieved multiple broken bones from him for no reason at all, and I'm sure the the majority of my mental/emotional problems are his fault too.

    Even now, he still goes to my school, and he's turned his entire group of friends against of me. I get beat up all the time, and have horrible rumors started about me, when I've done nothing to give them any reason to hate me.
    I don't understand it...
  6. Clockwork Reality

    Clockwork Reality Well-Known Member

    I was a big brother and I hope that I was good to my little bro. :blink: There was a big age difference between us (13 years) and I swatted him once for trying to jam a toy into an electric outlet. I still feel bad about that.

    I'm sorry that you didn't have a good relationship with your brother. That's just sad, older brothers should be role models IMO.

    Like others have said, good living is the best thing you can do. Show him how it's done and that you're the better person. As satisfying as "revenge" might seem, it certainly isn't worth going to jail over! You have your own life to live, and exacting revenge in the traditional sense will just take that away.
  7. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I do, My bro owes me 3k:dry:
  8. justafool

    justafool Well-Known Member

    Your brother abused you, which is very bad, but at least he was interested in you. My brother has always been an aloof, cold-hearted snob. That wouldn't matter at all except I really could have used a decent brother or sister in my life.

    At least I didn't get beat up. :dry:
  9. mike25

    mike25 Well-Known Member

    Your brother sounds like a devil. It's a nightmarish story, one that many forum members can relate to. When the pain has penetrated into your being so deeply, there's only one course of action, that is, to accept you'll never get on with your brother, so distance yourself, because the total absence of his presence will help YOU and your spirit to heal - but it will still take time.
    I'd be interested to know if he's repentant for any of the sufferings he inflicted upon you? If not, then the road is long that doesn't have a turn.
  10. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    cant believe this was bumped,the older I get the more I pity my brother and the more I hate other people

    I dont think my brother was a terrible person, just a fucked up person which is a result of this evil world

    I wish I was alive and healthier so I could actually forgive my brother, maybe in some ways it bothers him what he did to me, I think he actually cares about me which sucks

    My hatred is reserved for external forces, not my brother

    damn I cant believe I wrote this crap, such anger, I dont think my anger is justified towards my brother, but more justified towards other people who probably fucked up my family in some way

    cant believe this shit I wrote just a year ago, my brother isn't the problem other people are
  11. bluegrey

    bluegrey Antiquities Friend

    My Brother and I had frequent brutal fistfights growing up. We were such nervous wrecks over my Father's constant vicious physical abuse that we went after each other over the most trivial provocation. He is two and a half years older than me and tougher than a railroad spike so I usually ended up losing our bouts.

    Some time in our late teens we began to realize we were actually allies against our knuckle dragging Neanderthal bigoted psycho Father. For over two decades now we have been as close as two brothers could possibly be. This might not be a common experience but my Brother and I went from hate to love almost overnight.
  12. X-51

    X-51 Active Member

    I was incredibly cruel to my brother.

    I was the older of the two of us, and I treated him miserably. I don't know why I hated him, but I truly did. He really did absolutely nothing to deserve it. I used to treat him like garbage, say incredibly cruel things to him. Told him I hated him, chased him around the house untill he cried and locked himself in the bathroom trying to get away. Chasing him with belts, hangers, whatever I could get my hands on and hurt him with. Whatever insults I could hurl at him. It didn't matter, I had no restraint. Just completely fucking mean.

    I have no idea in retrospect why I was so mean to him. It's odd too, because the older I get the more passive I become. Violence has no meaning to me anymore, but back then it consumed me, and really for absolutely no reason.

    The part that hurts the most, is he just wanted me to like him. To take him places and hang out, be the friend and confidant I was supposed to be as his brother. The only thing he really wanted was to be liked, and I reciprocated with brutality. I didn't want him to idolize me, or look up to me. I didn't want his affection. I wanted him dead. A fact that I made quite clear to him numerous times.

    My cruelty and arrogance had no genesis however. It just manifested every time I saw him. I have no idea to this day why I treated him so cruely. It still bothers me, years after leaving the house.

    I was a trouble maker as a kid, broke laws, went to jail a few times. Did drugs, skipped school. I started smoking around 9. All that jazz.

    He was the good son. Made good grades, never made bad choices. But he had very few true friends. I was supposed to be that friend, and I was his worst enemy. I can't imagine what kind of horrible things I did to his mind and self esteem.

    After I left the house, alot of things changed. Since I left at such a young age (16) I had to hit the ground with both feet. I kinda figured that if I didn't leave when I did, things would get worse between me and my parents, and I would end up a completely useless person. It was hard, but I did alot of growing up and I learned how much I depend on the people that had been there from the start and I had ignored.

    My parents felt that they had screwed up with me, and decided to treat my brother differently, giving him more permissions and freedom, which I resented at first, but later understood.

    Unfortunately, my brother (from what I can tell) kinda fell off. He started doing drugs, hanging out with assholes and is now in debt and we havn't spoken in years.

    I often wonder how much of his current lifestyle I'm responsible for. I have no idea of the true extent the damage that I caused his mind and mental well-being. It's been my scar of longinus for some time now. It brings a certain pain that nothing else has so far been able to eclipse.

    As much as I used to tell him I hated him, I think that now if I heard him say that to me, it would kill me. I feel empty because of what I put him through. To an extent, I feel as though I betrayed him. What I was supposed to be.

    You might be surprised how your brother feels about how he treated you.
    I know how I treated mine will haunt me forever. Even if he's forgiven me.
  13. raincloud

    raincloud Well-Known Member

    I hate my brother. I'm 11 years younger. He is emotionally manipulative and abusive. He robbed our mother completely blind while she was dying (he's a lawyer was executor of her estate and had control of her finances). I was a college student and he was a lawyer with a six-figure salary. I had to quit school prematurely. My mom left me a huge inheritance and I never got a penny. Now I'm facing homelessness and he has a country club membership. He also took our mom's ashes and scattered them without telling me. I gave him all of my photographs of our dead mom so he could "scan them" then he refused to give them back. Fortunately, I found some more pics in storage. He once punched me when I told him I hated him. I haven't spoken to him in over 4 years, and never will again.
  14. sadguy33

    sadguy33 Banned Member

    Wait so its alright for you to hate him for no reason but if he hates you for making his life a living hell you are going to take offense to that???? Also you did betray him as an older brother.
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