Empathy Only Anyone losing their job over covid vaccine mandate?

NoraVera

SF Supporter
#1
I was recently forced out of work due to my country (Italy) implementing a strict covid vaccine mandate on all workers. There is no job in the whole country you can do without proof of vaccination or taking a covid test every 2 days. Unless you find a remote position which is very hard to find here. For various reasons that I don't really wanna get into I cannot bring myself to get the vaccine, but my reasons are not enough to be granted an exemption. The covid test option is not financially or psychologically sustainable to me so I had to rule that out too.
So I had my last day at work last Thursday and will be working remote for them until the end of the month to "at least help them out", like this is all and only my fault letting people down.

I've been harassed, bullied and called names for my choice both at work and outside and lost basically all of my friends over this.
And I'm frightened to even post this here because I know this is a very controversial topic and most people reading would hate me and think I deserve whatever comes my way. That I'm just unworthy of life if I cannot conform, that I'm some sort of terrorist and social burden and would deserve to die of covid and see all my loved ones die of covid because of me.
The pressure has been and is still so heavy I don't even know who to talk to anymore, what to say. I just listen to criticism and stay quiet.

I don't wanna make this about pro/no vax. I respect anyone's views and choices.
For the record I always complied with mask and social distancing and any other requirements, I keep to myself, avoid fragile/old people and social activities in general. I always disclose that I'm not vaccinated to anyone I meet or end up spending time with for whatever reason. So that if anyone feels uncomfortable I just leave. I'm never judging or expecting people to understand (or even listen to) me, I never try to convince people I am right. I don't even know if I am right at all.

Still I feel trapped, like a nightmare I cannot escape, like the walls are closing in and soon I won't even be allowed to exist. So I thought I would just go ahead and rid the world of this disgusting and unacceptable human being who is so socially awkward and unfit. Which would be a relief for so many other reasons too. Except, I feel guilty for the few people I would leave behind and that I know I would hurt badly.
It's so unfair that I don't even have the luxury to just leave in peace without any harm to others. Whichever choice I make, whatever I do, someone ends up hurting.

Is anyone going through something like this?
Is there anyone from Italy who can relate to this huge amount of pressure we are under?
 

KA9

Gone with the wind
#2
I didn't lose a job per se because I can't work anyway, but same boat. I'm not getting the damn jab for both health and other reasons, and any time the topic comes up (aside from my circle of people), people treat me like the worst scum on Earth.

Lately I was reminiscing about the old times of my taxi driving, and was thinking that maybe I could do that again occasionally. But of course, vaccination is mandated for that as well, any other job.

Since I spend all my time squatting in isolation anyway, all those mandates don't affect me too much... I mean I can get groceries and go to the post office *for now*... But try to do anything else and we're 2nd class citizens at best. Can't work, can't eat outside... As if we don't already have enough limitations and shit to deal with.
 

NoraVera

SF Supporter
#3
Thank you KA9, it means the world to me to know others can relate. I feel so alone and rejected by people who used to say everyone is equal and should be at least tolerated for their unique flaws, but it doesn't apply here, I'm just damaged goods to be discarded fast, before I make even more damage.

I also wasn't affected too much because I lead a very solitary life in general, but this hit the one thing I was good at, the one thing I need to survive. So the message is clear. You don't belong anymore so you don't deserve to survive.

I'm sorry you are hurting too, I don't even know what to expect or hope for people like us anymore.
 

Ash600

Of dust and shadows
SF Creative
SF Supporter
#4
Hi there @NoraVera

That is a lot of torment you seem to be having to deal with right now and I'm sorry that it's hit you so hard. People can have various reasons for not wanting the vaccine. Sadly, there's people out there who can totally overreact when confronted by those who have refused to get vaccinated. Often based on irrationality and the absence to even consider that person's views and choices and their reasons why.

For what it's worth, I have had the vaccine, I work in healthcare, and for whatever reasons you have for not wanting the vaccine, that's your decision and I don't believe you should be persecuted in the way in which you have been. Of course in the ideal situation, I would prefer everyone to be able to protect themselves, but I can understand that for some, they have their reasons.

It's a very difficult situation, extremely emotive and so hard to find a balance. Sorry that you've been caught up in it, but I hope you'll keep on talking here, especially if it helps.
 

eF577w0mK

Well-Known Member
#5
Something important to keep in mind, I think, specially when it comes to matters of politics, is that when you talk to strangers they don't really look at you as a full-fledged person, but rather as a set of labels, and they judge not for who you are but rather use you to express their dislike for an abstract concept or their sense of the Other. So if someone is in prison then he's an evil person, if someone is fat then she's lazy or self-indulgent, if someone is a conservative then they are bigots, and if someone is a liberal then they are indovidualistic, etc. It's an automatic judgement which doesn't really consider anything about who you are specifically. But in general when people get to know a person, and is presented to them in a positive light, people tend to do the opposite; that's why there is a lot of sympathy for movie villains but contempt for the neighbour next door, because we actually know the first one first hand but the second one only through external generalities.
 

Ash600

Of dust and shadows
SF Creative
SF Supporter
#7
Thank you for your kindness Ash, it really means a lot. I never expected to find so much compassion and understanding in this community which I'm loving more every passing day. It's moving and really helps feeling less alone in the world.
Glad to hear that you're feeling less alone by being here. Keep on chatting, here to help or at least try.
 

NoraVera

SF Supporter
#8
Something important to keep in mind, I think, specially when it comes to matters of politics, is that when you talk to strangers they don't really look at you as a full-fledged person, but rather as a set of labels, and they judge not for who you are but rather use you to express their dislike for an abstract concept or their sense of the Other. So if someone is in prison then he's an evil person, if someone is fat then she's lazy or self-indulgent, if someone is a conservative then they are bigots, and if someone is a liberal then they are indovidualistic, etc. It's an automatic judgement which doesn't really consider anything about who you are specifically. But in general when people get to know a person, and is presented to them in a positive light, people tend to do the opposite; that's why there is a lot of sympathy for movie villains but contempt for the neighbour next door, because we actually know the first one first hand but the second one only through external generalities.
That is a very insightful comment, I couldn't agree more. I can understand why people do that to some extent, in the sense that labels help rationalize the world around us and go about our lives without stopping to ponder and consider and second-guess everything.
But when they barricade behind their beliefs and become aggressive about it I feel so lost. Like we are looking at the same thing and I'm trying to present an alternative view but the sheer fact of doing that is in itself despicable and inadmissible. It's no longer a question of sharing opinions and evaluating facts, it becomes a matter of faith to a certain ideal or group identity. And obviously I'm not taking sides in this, I see people with all sorts of beliefs doing the exact same thing.
 

Ash600

Of dust and shadows
SF Creative
SF Supporter
#9
That is a very insightful comment, I couldn't agree more. I can understand why people do that to some extent, in the sense that labels help rationalize the world around us and go about our lives without stopping to ponder and consider and second-guess everything.
But when they barricade behind their beliefs and become aggressive about it I feel so lost. Like we are looking at the same thing and I'm trying to present an alternative view but the sheer fact of doing that is in itself despicable and inadmissible. It's no longer a question of sharing opinions and evaluating facts, it becomes a matter of faith to a certain ideal or group identity. And obviously I'm not taking sides in this, I see people with all sorts of beliefs doing the exact same thing.
In absolute agreement with what you and @SantiagoRC have said. In some respects, categorising people can be useful at times. However so often it's a tool that's misused. There just seems to be an obsession with having to assign people with labels. Perhaps in some perverse subconscious way it makes them feel comfortable that some type of "order" is in place as it allows for a sense of predictability particularly with expectations on how a defined group may act.
Dangers of this is of course is firstly, it may lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy for someone assigned to a "group". ie "well, if I've been labelled as such fuck it I might as well act according to expectations." Or secondly, someone not conforming to what is expected of being part of a that "group" could be seen as "different" or a "deviant" even and so considered to be a threat to the status quo.

That's what herd mentality can do, erode away at individualism. It's an often repeated mistake, judging people, not the individual.
 

Champagne

✯✯ Heart of an angel ✯✯
Staff Alumni
SF Supporter
#10
In absolute agreement with what you and @SantiagoRC have said. In some respects, categorising people can be useful at times. However so often it's a tool that's misused. There just seems to be an obsession with having to assign people with labels. Perhaps in some perverse subconscious way it makes them feel comfortable that some type of "order" is in place as it allows for a sense of predictability particularly with expectations on how a defined group may act.
Dangers of this is of course is firstly, it may lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy for someone assigned to a "group". ie "well, if I've been labelled as such fuck it I might as well act according to expectations." Or secondly, someone not conforming to what is expected of being part of a that "group" could be seen as "different" or a "deviant" even and so considered to be a threat to the status quo.

That's what herd mentality can do, erode away at individualism. It's an often repeated mistake, judging people, not the individual.
Hi Ash, would just like to say, I agree X a billion times. Your post is the picture of a great mind. You write what you believe in so perfectly and if I were to say how I feel on this, it would be exactly this post but you worded it so much better than I ever could. Just perfectly worded. Thank you for this amazing post Ash. Your brilliant mind is as it always was, you're a genius Ash. :) Hello btw :) I hope you're doing well :) To heck with labels, to heck with division, be who you are, who you were born and to heck with what anyone else thinks, no one should ever feel like an outcast for their beliefs, uniqueness is where its at.

Sending well wishes to the OP. I am sorry you're going through this, you are not alone and you don't have to feel isolated or outcasted for being who you are. Sorry you are going through all this pressure, anxiety and I hope one way or another, it settles or you find a solution, best wishes @NoraVera Thinking of you.
 

Walker

Admin
SF Social Media
SF Author
SF Supporter
#11
Hi @NoraVera I'm sorry all this is happening and it feels like things are closing in around you there. My job hasn't been problematic because of covid so I can't relate on that front but wanted to say hi and I hope you stick around and keep talking.
 

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