^^but I do believe that whatever is going on —& wrong: (in your life!) could or can be attributed to whatever is psychologically affected / effected by this, or your condition (no matter what it is... anxiety, etc.?) ... So my point basically is to not blame your self; for yo udidn’t actually do anything wrong per se- it was more a manifestation of these characteristics & tendencies that can be associated with, or come along as part of the territory of whatever is hurting you, psychiatrically, or otherwise! : )