I am at a point where I'm seriously considering putting myself in the hospital. It's not a decision I'm taking lightly. Here's the thing. I was hospitalized as a kid. I was 11 years old. It was not a good experience. It was decided that I was too young for the adolescent ward so I was put with the adults. I had groups with the teenagers but was definitely an outsider since they were all together and the only saw me at certain times. My roommate was a 24 year old on suicide watch. So between the extra person in the room and the nightly checks, sleep was impossible. Which of course was counted against me. I did get a new roommate after a while, but it was worse. She was an elderly woman who screamed for the nurse all night. Again, you had the CNAs coming in twice a night and going through your things and reading your journals. It was also held against me that I was never in the common room. The tv was constantly at full volume and I couldn't deal with the noise. The one time I did watch TV my choice of program was held against me. Therapy was a joke. My very controlling mother was almost always there. And when she wasn't he (the shrink) made sure to tell her everything I told him. The fact that I wouldn't talk....again counted against me. This wasn't even the half of it. That was 25 years ago. If I go back it will probably be to the same place. I can't do that again. Do you think things have changed or gotten any better?