Ever since my younger years of depression, i have been on self-destruction mode. I take drugs, steal, fight, reckless behavior at work, not paying bills etc etc... I'm not a moron, i realize the conscequences of such behaviors, but i still didn't care. It's as if i'm waiting for something to push me off the cliff. My whole life has been nothing but a slippery slope. I live each day in hope something would kill me. Be it an accident or be place in someone's murderous path. Don't give me the guilty conscience talk on how i should be grateful that i still have my health and that i'm an idiot for wanting to die when millions of people wants to live but can't. Well, i'll glady donate my organs to save them. Anyway, i want to know if any of you also feel the same way? Like waiting for the final screw up to end it.