Well, I know from personal experience that suicide hotlines will call the police and arrest you if you're honest with them.
I'm still hesitant to disclose my plans, and that seems to be against the rules, so I won't. But basically they're being set in motion because I have failed my life. I am not valuable to human society, I will never be self-sufficient, I will never have an income, I will never be worth anything. My parents divorced when I was twelve. I moved to a low income, high crime area in another state. I dropped out of high school due to domestic abuse and bullying. I was bullied and tortured mercilessly every day at school, then my mother and I were beaten at home. I tried to kill myself when I was fifteen, and spent nearly a year in a psych ward.
A lot of stuff happened since then, and I have attempted to get my GED for years. You NEED a HSD or GED to get hired in this world. I had passed everything except for the Math, but I could never get it. Recently, they deleted all of my work, and made the Math portion of the test much more difficult.
http://www.sacbee.com/2014/01/13/6069988/new-ged-testing-requires-computer.html This crushed me. It's as if I never even went. I know I will certainly never ever be able to pass it now, as I never came close to passing the Math before with years of study. I missed my window to prove myself, I have failed my GED, I have failed at life. I will never get a job, I will never have income, I will never have money. A life with no money is not a life worth living. Without money, you cannot be independent, you cannot support yourself; you must exist as a vassal. I cannot drive, and no one will teach me to drive. I will not cope with being homeless. I will not exist as a parasite to society. I will not exist as a vassal.
I can't see a psychiatrist or a professional because I have no money or transportation and the people I live with who have money/transportation would not tolerate it, they would persecute me for it. I don't have anyone I'll miss in this world. I don't care about my family, and they don't care about me. We are political enemies, we have opposite life philosophies, and we argue intensely everyday. I despise this house and everyone in it. I despise this area that I live in. I value almost nothing here, and I don't even have anyone that I want to say goodbye to. I give up. I am defective. I have failed to get a GED. I failed to prove that I am valuable and worth giving an income to. I have failed human society. I have failed my life. I don't know why I'm even posting this, I guess that some part of me is seeking pity. Me posting this instead of just executing my plans silently is more evidence that I'm a weak, disposable human. What a useless loser.