Are you out of cigarettes?
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I got a few left of a pack then I've got $25 left from birthday money.
I think the universe wants me to keep smoking because every time I run out of money some pops up. Or cigarettes pop up from a friend buying me some or something.
I don't have a job so I can't depend on having cigarettes :laugh:. But whatever, it's probably better that way. That way I'll smoke less, and eventually I want to stop smoking everyday and just become a "social smoker" or whatever.
The things I enjoy about smoking though are the time-outs. It's almost like I'm in meditation when I'm smoking. Though smoking is not a drug, when I do drugs I prefer to do it by myself, solitary. Same with smoking. I think, I have wonderful inspiration that I write down. It happens so often I feel like I could write a book someday. I don't take these time-outs when I don't have cigarettes. I don't have the meditation and inspiration. I know I can do it without the cigarettes but right now they help me.
I also enjoy the self-destructive aspect of it. I know that I am taking minutes off my life. Blackening my lungs. I know that even though it is slight and subtle, I am hurting myself, and I like that idea.
But anyway, here's to nicotine! Here's to black lungs! :smoke:
I think the universe wants me to keep smoking because every time I run out of money some pops up. Or cigarettes pop up from a friend buying me some or something.
I don't have a job so I can't depend on having cigarettes :laugh:. But whatever, it's probably better that way. That way I'll smoke less, and eventually I want to stop smoking everyday and just become a "social smoker" or whatever.
The things I enjoy about smoking though are the time-outs. It's almost like I'm in meditation when I'm smoking. Though smoking is not a drug, when I do drugs I prefer to do it by myself, solitary. Same with smoking. I think, I have wonderful inspiration that I write down. It happens so often I feel like I could write a book someday. I don't take these time-outs when I don't have cigarettes. I don't have the meditation and inspiration. I know I can do it without the cigarettes but right now they help me.
I also enjoy the self-destructive aspect of it. I know that I am taking minutes off my life. Blackening my lungs. I know that even though it is slight and subtle, I am hurting myself, and I like that idea.
But anyway, here's to nicotine! Here's to black lungs! :smoke:
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