Argh (Trigger - Sorry)

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by nazustro, Dec 12, 2008.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. nazustro

    nazustro Guest

    I wish someone I love dearly would tell me about things more, instead of leaving me in the dark, I hate being left in the dark, I’ve been left in the dark all my life and I don’t want to be left in the dark for any longer especially when it’s about something important like when they’re feeling depressed and possibly suicidal, It leaves me feeling so useless and pathetic, thinking that person deserves better as they obviously can’t open themselves up to me.

    I understand it’s not easy especially when you’ve been through something so horrific in your life, you don’t want anyone to know and when people enquire or you have the temptation to open up to someone... you back away because of the ‘fear’, fear of being judged, fear of reliving it again and the fear of just being abused again, it leaves you so scarred when it comes to social interaction, you feel like you can never trust a single soul and are left with this deadly secret destroying you from the inside out, for the rest of your life.

    Anyway, I've never been through something like that myself so I wouldn't know and that means my opinion is strictly from the outside, trying to look at what's on the other side a 100 foot thick door, peering through a small keyhole while partially blind... just a metaphor but there was no other way that I could explain it.

    I care about this person so much that seeing what this person is having to deal with makes me want to go on a murderous rampage after whomever did this to the person in 'question', making sure that the person responsible feels just what it's like to have to go through what did to the person that I love so much.

    God, it makes me so fucking angry to the point that I wish the Germans won the war, resulting in fascism being a globally followed policy which would have also resulted in the fucking ****s who think doing these sort of things is acceptable, being hanged by their testicles while having their throat cut.

    Don't get me wrong, I absolutely despise what the Nazi's did especially when it comes to the Jews but I can't help but think that the world would of been a better place in the sense that justice is something that would be served without question and the government would actually be a force to be reckoned with as today... you can basically get away with murder and not have to face any consequences, it's bloody ridiculous. There's no way that we're ever going to colonise another planet at this rate etc...

    I'm not a racist or anything before anyone calls me that, I just loathe murders, rapists etc... With every single minute atom in my body, I believe that they should have to go through what they've made others go through... otherwise... where's the justice?

    Anyway, the question, sorry about my rant, is how do you think I can get the person in question to open up to me more? The person knows that I love 'it' dearly and care about 'it' more than I've ever cared about single solitude thing in my life - I'm always very supportive, never raising any aggressive or threatening or demeaning notion or attitude to the person and they know that I'm always there for them although they rarely choose to use me - The person knows that I'd even die for 'it', if 'it' wanted me to.

    I’m really tired so I may not be making much sense and I’ve most probably missed alot out - I'm not expecting anyone to reply, I just needed a place to vent as I have nowhere else.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.