I broke a promise. I'm sorry. I said I would do it but I backed out. My plan was ready. I could had done it anytime I wanted to. My mind got the best of me. I don't know why I didn't, but I didn't. Have you ever been in this point? Where you're as low as you can go and you just want to end it, but you back out of that? I'm so remarkably low at this moment I don't know what's going to happen. I guess I can kill myself any day I want now. Please don't say you're happy I'm alive, because I'm fucking not and you're all liars. I know that someone must of been betting on weather or not I was going to kill myself. I'm sorry to whomever lost money because I didn't. I keep coming back to this forum for reasons unknown, I would love it if the admins would just ban me. I don't want to be banned for the stuff I do as I don't want to hurt anyone or look like an idiot saying ways to kill yourself. At this point I'm so fucking lonely I just want to talk to someone. Anyone I cry because no one finds interest in me. I want to kill myself because of how I view life in general and have no anxiety problems. Yet, I find myself crying because everyone in this forum thinks I'm crazy when it's a forum dedicated to resolving suicidal issues? I don't know what I should do at this point. I don't know if I should go to bed or shoot myself in the head. I could get on chat but I'd just be there and no one would talk to me as usual. Fuck the world, man.