I had a job interview today, and I was actually feeling fairly confident and in good spirits. I was feeling nervous, but managed to keep it under control. I went into the video store and looked around for a bit. There were some women behind the counter, but since I was about 20 minutes early, I figured I should just look around until it was my time to be interviewed. I waited and waited, even past the time my interview was supposed to start, but no one came to talk to me. Customers came in and employees waited on them, but no one acknowledged me at all. I just didn't know what to do. I was too nervous to speak. The longer I waited, the more nervous I became. I even started crying and tried to pass it off as allergies. then it got to be too much to bear. I left after being there for like half an hour. One of the employees saw that I couldn't open the door, so he pushed some latch to open it for me. No one asked if I needed help with anything, no one said a word to me. Surely they could see I had been crying. My eyes were red and blotchy. I cried all the way home, but no one stopped to ask if I was ok. No one noticed me at all. No one ever cares how I am doing, so I suppose that is not a big surprise. When I arrived home, my mom was outside talking to the neighbor. I thought I would be able to sneak in before she got home and pretend like I had a real interview. No, she saw what I was like, I told her I wasn't ok but I also said nothing was wrong. I don't want to talk to her about it. I don't want to talk to anyone about it. A lot of people were rooting for me. I just let them all down. My friend was assuring me I could do it. I've failed him and I am sure he will hate me now. If I can't even get over my nerves to have a job interview, how will I ever work? I won't because I am a failure and always will be. Now I know the only solution is suicide because I will always be a gigantic loser. Now I know my time on this earth is limited, and I need to act on my plan soon.