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Asking for help

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Finally, I think I've come to a point in my life where I think I can and should seek help, whether through therapy, counseling, whatever. I think I really need to start growing up and figuring out my problems so I can tackle them. Unfortunately, I'm still living with my parents, and I'm still studying, and it's kind of usual here for kids to stay with their parents until they get married. Besides, I know I can't support myself financially just yet and I really need my parents' help. The problem is I don't want to burden them with this. I know that finding out that their child is this depressed, suicidal, drug addicted person will hurt them and I just don't want to put them through all that, especially with the stigma of having a family member with mental health problems. But it's getting to the point where I feel like I really really have to get help or else I'll just keep sinking faster and faster till I've sunk so far down it'll be impossible to get back up.

The other day, my mother saw the burns I made on my arm with a cigarette. She completely flipped out and demanded shrilly, "WHAT DID YOU DO TO YOURSELF?" She was getting angry all of a sudden, and my father was getting a bit riled up, too. I just lied and said it happened while I was cooking over at a friend's place and it took a while for them to believe me, but they just left it at that. But I already saw how bad a reaction my parents could have if they found out I've been doing all this self-destructive behavior... I'm just really not sure how to go about this. I still have cuts on my arm from self-injuring a few weeks ago and I still have the pills I abuse hidden in my room. I'm hoping that my parents won't have to see the cuts and the pills so I'm sort of waiting it out till the scars fade and the pills slowly disappear so I don't have to tell them that I *just* cut myself or that I *still* have pills stashed in my room. Maybe not seeing those things will soften the blow a little bit, even if they find out about them.
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