With each passing day, I'm getting worse. I have thoughts of suicide all the time. I don't know how I would do it, so nothing ever gets planned, but I want to die. The worst part is that I can't admit it. I've had therapists, but I keep all of my suicidal feelings locked up. I'm afraid of disappointing people and I go great lengths to seem "okay." I feel like I'm going crazy. I've been severely depressed for years, but I was recently diagnosed with a sever anxiety disorder, and my paranoia has begun to get out of hand. I get panic attacks. In general, I worry and get set off by the most trivial things. The only thing keeping me alive is that I love my girlfriend, and my family and friends. Otherwise, there's nothing I care about. I don't know what to do when I can't even say out loud that I'm depressed. I'm worried, as well, that if I say anything in "real life" - so to speak - that I'll be taken into the hospital or something. Perhaps it would be good for me, but I'm too anxious about how it'll affect me. Right now, I have good grades in school and I don't want to get behind. That would only make me feel worse and more distraught.