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Practical Advice At what point do you seek hospit

Tor

SF Supporter
#1
I’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense. I am trying to be as cohesive as possible.

I tried to take 3 days off of work to relax and sort some things out mentally in hopes that I could return to work in a better place. All I have been doing there for the last two weeks is crying and feeling heavily anxious and depressed.

A few triggering events occurred the second day (yesterday) and I am feeling out of control, maybe even psychotic. I wrote a suicide note last night and planned to attempt, but didn’t. Still, that left me feeling scared by the reality that I was so close. This morning, I awoke in a rage bc the upstairs neighbor was vacuuming at 7 am. I have been horrible to my girlfriend, but I’m not meaning to be at all, and this is making me feel so much worse. I feel like I should remove myself from her so she doesn’t have to deal with me.

I feel so upset about the fact that my 3 days feel ruined. This time off felt sacred since I had to work so hard to get it. So now I left wondering if I should try the hospital again. I first went in 2011, but didn’t find it as helpful as I had perceived. I feel like the only way I might be able to get time away at this point, is to consider hospitalization.

I’m not sure how much sense this all makes, but I’m not sure what to do. I feel so lost, crazy, confused and defeated. I don’t feel like a danger to myself, but I want to feel better. I don’t feel suicidal at this time, but I do feel so much heavy darkness consuming me.

Thank you to anyone who reads this
 

Tor

SF Supporter
#4
I’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense. I am trying to be as cohesive as possible.

I tried to take 3 days off of work to relax and sort some things out mentally in hopes that I could return to work in a better place. All I have been doing there for the last two weeks is crying and feeling heavily anxious and depressed.

A few triggering events occurred the second day (yesterday) and I am feeling out of control, maybe even psychotic. I wrote a suicide note last night and planned to attempt, but didn’t. Still, that left me feeling scared by the reality that I was so close. This morning, I awoke in a rage bc the upstairs neighbor was vacuuming at 7 am. I have been horrible to my girlfriend, but I’m not meaning to be at all, and this is making me feel so much worse. I feel like I should remove myself from her so she doesn’t have to deal with me.

I feel so upset about the fact that my 3 days feel ruined. This time off felt sacred since I had to work so hard to get it. So now I left wondering if I should try the hospital again. I first went in 2011, but didn’t find it as helpful as I had perceived. I feel like the only way I might be able to get time away at this point, is to consider hospitalization.

I’m not sure how much sense this all makes, but I’m not sure what to do. I feel so lost, crazy, confused and defeated. I don’t feel like a danger to myself, but I want to feel better. I don’t feel suicidal at this time, but I do feel so much heavy darkness consuming me.

Thank you to anyone who reads this
*Hospital
 

Tor

SF Supporter
#5
Hey there
It sounds as though you might need to try the hospital again, man. Can you talk to you gf about what is going on?[/QUOTE


Thank you for your response. I am heavily considering checking myself in, but need to sort out time off with work, as I’m terrified of losing my job. I talk to her so much about what I feel, but I see the distress and worry it is causing her, which makes me feel guilty
 

Tor

SF Supporter
#6
Definitely sounds like the time to seek professional treatment. Even if you're not suicidal right now.
Thank you for responding to me. I think it may be necessary to admit myself, but I am so worried about losing my job, so I need to somehow get time off. I am afraid to go, but a little afraid to not go either
 
#7
I have been horrible to my girlfriend, but I’m not meaning to be at all, and this is making me feel so much worse. I feel like I should remove myself from her so she doesn’t have to deal with me.
Have you communicated with her at all about this?

It may help to send her a letter or an email. If you apologize about how you've treated her and explain what you're going through, it may be easier for her to deal with this. Limiting your contact with her for a week or so might be good if you need some time to try to get into a better state of mind.

I feel like the only way I might be able to get time away at this point, is to consider hospitalization.
Generally speaking, honesty is the best policy, but if it's difficult for you to get much needed time away for mental health reasons, and you can't get it, maybe just tell them you've got Covid symptoms. You've got to be careful with how you play your cards though.

It sounds like going to work would just add to your stress, and might lead to you blowing up at coworkers, which wouldn't be good for anyone.

I don’t feel like a danger to myself
They're probably not even going to admit you to the hospital if you're not a danger to yourself or to others (unless you've got good insurance, they might admit you for financial reasons). The hospital wouldn't necessarily do you any good, the main reason people need inpatient care is to make sure they don't make a suicide attempt.
 

Dante

Took 5 years to learn how to make a custom title.
SF Supporter
#8
Most of the time I feel like I NEED time off to recharge and recover, but whenever I get that time off I end up spiralling because work is actually a stabilising influence to me, I feel like I need a break because I dont have time to process or deal with my issues at work, I just have to power though, but at the same time, thats WHY it is helping me to hold on, it stops me obsessing, stops me spiralling and forces me to deal with my surroundings directly in a normal and healthy way in order to do my job. It is enforcing normal behaviour and thought patterns for a large amount of time each day by not giving me a second to think about anything but the moment I am in that very moment.

Its tiring, but very useful, if you want to take time off for a break I would suggest planning your time, having a late start followed by structured activity, something to keep you focused in the moment and stop your mind turning on itself for at least most of the day.
 

Always Hopeless

Well-Known Member
#10
To be honest the hospital has never been helpful in getting better. All they do is keep you until you're no longer in crisis and "stable".

If you're not in crisis I would honestly suggest therapy sessions instead. See if you can get some web based therapy and they can let you know if they think you need to be hospitalized or just continue therapy.
 

Anonymous ID

Well-Known Member
#12
I’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense. I am trying to be as cohesive as possible.

I tried to take 3 days off of work to relax and sort some things out mentally in hopes that I could return to work in a better place. All I have been doing there for the last two weeks is crying and feeling heavily anxious and depressed.

A few triggering events occurred the second day (yesterday) and I am feeling out of control, maybe even psychotic. I wrote a suicide note last night and planned to attempt, but didn’t. Still, that left me feeling scared by the reality that I was so close. This morning, I awoke in a rage bc the upstairs neighbor was vacuuming at 7 am. I have been horrible to my girlfriend, but I’m not meaning to be at all, and this is making me feel so much worse. I feel like I should remove myself from her so she doesn’t have to deal with me.

I feel so upset about the fact that my 3 days feel ruined. This time off felt sacred since I had to work so hard to get it. So now I left wondering if I should try the hospital again. I first went in 2011, but didn’t find it as helpful as I had perceived. I feel like the only way I might be able to get time away at this point, is to consider hospitalization.

I’m not sure how much sense this all makes, but I’m not sure what to do. I feel so lost, crazy, confused and defeated. I don’t feel like a danger to myself, but I want to feel better. I don’t feel suicidal at this time, but I do feel so much heavy darkness consuming me.

Thank you to anyone who reads this
I'm in hospital at the moment and wouldn't recommend it. They just make me so angry. They got to learn to treat mental health patients with respect
 

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