Attachment to the first person I told

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by hiimpaul2014, Nov 2, 2014.

  1. hiimpaul2014

    hiimpaul2014 New Member

    I do not really see myself as gay or bisexual or anything. I can appreciate an attractive male, but I don't want to have any sexual relations with a male.

    The person I told about being depressed and suicidal happened to be a guy. Now I cannot stop thinking of him. I just want to hang out with him all the time. I just want to be super close friends.

    Is it possible to develop feelings of wanting an abnormally close relationship/friendship with the first person that you told about being depressed and suicidal?
  2. Prinnctopher's Belt

    Prinnctopher's Belt Antiquities Friend SF Supporter

    There's nothing wrong with making friends. These are people who get to know who we are on an emotional level, so it's not abnormal to feel some type of desire to spend time with them and make them part of your life. You said you don't have any romantic, intimate or sexual feelings with this guy, so a friendship is completely innocuous and there isn't anything slightly erotic about it whatsoever that even requires you to make a disclaimer that you aren't homosexual.

    Now, if he thinks you're coming onto him by asking to go out to watch football someday or play some golf or something, then that sounds like a personal problem on his end. But remember that people here want to keep their privacy. They come here wanting someone to vent to and talk to who merely understands what it's like to be depressed and/or suicidal; they aren't necessarily looking to create real and meaningful friendships that exist in the real world after the computer turns off. There's also the matter of distance and resources that are obstacles to physical closeness.

    That bugs the hell out of me because I'm one of those people like you who wants to get together with like-minded folks and become real friends instead of distant "chat buddies". But if your chat buddy or whoever has borders where he doesn't feel comfortable meeting people, then you should respect that. If you're looking for get-togethers, there's always and the Meetups section of this forum where members arrange events to meet.