I attempted in May. It was a serious attempt, in that I wasn't just playing around, I really wanted to die, and it could have been fatal. I wont say what i did, because I don't want to trigger anyone, but if luck hadn't been with me (or against me, depending on how you look at it) I wouldn't be here now. I ended up in the hospital. They made me sign in to the psych ward. That wouldn't have been so bad- I've been there before, but I made ANOTHER attempt IN the psyh ward. Which was pretty stupid, I guess. Well, they found me and next thing I knew, I was committed. I had to be screened to be committed for legal reasons, and the guy who screened me was a huge jerk! he yelled at me, and demanded to know why I dared to kill myself, said that "How do you know the afterlife would be better" and said that "You will succeed, and then "hell will be too short" (what does that mean, he wants me to go hell???) and he was a TOTAL jerk, totally made me feel 100 times worse. I got out of the hospital in a week, thank God. I just made sure to follow all the rules and keep my head down. I brownnosed quite a bit with the doctors, and said all the right things. I left and felt better for a while. Now I'm struggling again. I hurt myself on Friday, didn't mean to die, just sort of an ambivalent gesture, seeing what it would feel like to hurt myself in a certain way. I feel better now though. Posting on this and other forums has really really helped me. I wish I had found this forum in May, things may have turned out better if I had. Since May, I've had some really good times, times when I'm glad I didn't succeed. I am really glad my mom didn't have to find me dead. That would have been awful for her. I didn't think of the effect it would have on my loved ones. I think in this latest brush with suicide, I have been thinking about the consequences more, including the way it would hurt those I care about. I am feeling better, and I'm glad to be on this forum.