Well, I did it in the end, and sadly my only regret is that it didn't do the job I thought it would. Ended up staying in hospital for several days, on a drip to protect my liver from permanent damage, and spent most of the first night throwing up what felt like battery acid, and then couldn't eat for 24 hours because my stomach couldn't hold anything down. So now I have to see a team of councilors on a daily basis, everyone's treating me differently, spoiling me and suchlike, which makes me feel so much worse, and if anything life seems even more pointless when nobody wants you to be on your own just in case you try it again. I suppose I should feel happy that I'm getting help, but I'm not finding it helping. It's patronizing garbage, and all I can do is sit and nod and pretend that they're making perfect sense. Depression is a logical trap. You can shut everything out hoping it will make things better, or you can put your trust in other people to help you, but it doesn't go away unless you fight it. I don't feel like I have any strength to fight it though, but I hope other people can. Taking an overdose solves nothing, especially if you think your problems are going to go away when you do. I wish they did work, but they just make you ill and make everyone around you suffer for it.