Atypical depression.

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by TheBLA, Sep 17, 2012.

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  1. TheBLA

    TheBLA The biggest loser alive.

    It looks like after many years of suffering from depression and suicidal thoughts, I finally know what type of depression I have, atypical. Now, I've never been to a mental health professional long enough to get a true diagnosis. I always give up on them because I think its no use and I can never be cured. But I believe I have this condition after reading its symptoms and seeing how eerily they fit mine. Its just like jigsaw pieces fitting exactly into a puzzle. I also learned how different it can be from major depression.
    I have a very big problem with oversleeping and always feelings lethergic and low on energy. I almost always feel like sleeping, no matter what. I have the exact opposite of insomnia which I hear affects those with major depression.

    I always have a strong craving for eating, especially chocolates and other sweets and foods high in carbohydrates that naturally comes the symptom of weight gain as well. For quite a while, I've definitely been overweight and due to eating unhealthy like this and having little to no excercise.

    Especially, I have an extremely strong fear of rejection, especially romantic rejection. Its gotten to the point that I don't even want to try anymore because I just know I'll be rejected again and feel that dagger through my heart. I always hate having that anxiety and quick and sudden spike in depression when such a rejection happens. Its happened several times now and you'd think I'd be used to it, but it never seems to get any easier. There is also a very high sensitivity to any criticism, even if totally founded and true.

    However, I don't have the reported symptom of having a heavy, "leaden" feeling in my arms or legs. But I read only a few experience that.

    Also, unlike "typical" depression, I actually do feel happy whenver positive events come in my life. However, these are so extremely rare and short-lived, that it doesn't seem to matter anyways.

    Does anyone else suffer from atypical depression as well?
  2. AlienBeing

    AlienBeing Well-Known Member

    Yes I have atypical depression too. Atypical depression is still major depressive disorder though. It just presents with some symptoms that are opposite to the originally described ones. You can have only some features that are atypical and some that are typical, like I usually have insomnia, unless some medication that I'm taking is making me oversleep. The rest of the symptoms of it, I have. I'm on 15mg of Parnate now and I think I'm feeling less suicidal, but I just want to stay in bed for the rest of my life, so it's a kind of living, vegetative death.
  3. TheBLA

    TheBLA The biggest loser alive.

    Thanks for your reply. Any others here have our certain flavor of depression as well? :)
  4. TheBLA

    TheBLA The biggest loser alive.

    Does anyone else on this forum also suffer from atypical depression?
  5. TheBLA

    TheBLA The biggest loser alive.

    It sounds like maybe atypical depression really isn't that common, at least on this forum?
  6. TheBLA

    TheBLA The biggest loser alive.

    I guess I am pretty rare here. Haha. I don't seem to fit in anywhere. ;)
  7. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Rahul-we've known each other a long time :) You have always fought your immense thoughts and impulses and you can do it again. Why not join the chatroom to make you feel less alone? :)
  8. SaraRose

    SaraRose Well-Known Member

    Rahul I know how you feel. When good stuff happens I can get happy, and enjoy life for that second. The only problem is if it's normal life then I'm constantly plagued with the thoughts...It's so hard because it would mean I would have to be doing something super special EVERY DAY and I can't afford that ever...
  9. TheBLA

    TheBLA The biggest loser alive.

    I had read that atypical depression is actually pretty common, despite the name. But it appears maybe its pretty rare among the members here, just that feeling I'm getting and most are suffering from "classic" depression. :)
    Yes, if good things happen to me, I will actually be happy. The only problem is that these happy moments are extremely rare or very short-lived, so I forget what happiness really feels like. I've been used to being in a low state for so long that its considered the "norm" for me.

    My life is 24/7 dysthamia and then triggers will cause my depression to spike very high and then back to dysthamia. It stinks that feeling "ok" is actually the best I can ever hope day to day.
    So I think I may as well just have regular depression anyways, ha!
    Its my depression which is also keeping me from finding any few happy moments or if they even do come to me, I'll probably just push them away. When your depression has existed for several years, its all you can ever know and it has changed your perspective forever!
  10. Jackie's Strength

    Jackie's Strength Staff Alumni

    I was recently told I have atypical depression as well. In my eyes, though, it's not all that different from "typical" depression. Yes, for the most part I tend to sleep more and eat more, but I also have trouble falling and staying asleep, and I have lost rather than gained weight. Furthermore, while certain things can make me feel "better," the vast majority of the time it is merely "better" enough to not hurt myself and keep me functioning at a minimal level (and I currently don't work or go to school, so that's not saying much). Really, I don't feel like I get a break at all. Indeed, that is what has me feeling so physically and emotionally drained sometimes.

    Just wanted to let you know you're not alone!
  11. SaraRose

    SaraRose Well-Known Member

    This is excatly how I feel. I'm always drained to where I'm dead tired at work and people always ask me why I'm so tired. But every now and then I can feel enough energy to maybe go 8 hours before wanting to just lie around...
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