Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by IDKwhatIwant, Oct 9, 2009.

  1. IDKwhatIwant

    IDKwhatIwant Well-Known Member

    i like a penpal. i want it to be like a long distance relationship, but its not. were good together though, which is why were interested in each other enough to make the penpal thing work. weve known each other for over a year. with a lot in common and the same views on stuff. its like perfect. id marry her. but... were just friends. :unsure: but... what really upset me. she doesnt want children. like, shell adopt, maybe a 5 year old and older. but, she doesnt want to get pregnant, and doesnt want a baby. thats like, a breaker for me. ive accepted other stuff like, oh well. but this is serious. i guess we can be friends, but now that the chance of it being more isnt there for me. im a little depressed. i just dont see the point anymore. i dont want to invest all that emotion, into someone i have no interest in. because im pretty sure, 99%, that i want children. at least one of my own.

  2. Mathale

    Mathale Well-Known Member

    Its ok mate.

    Youve experienced a level of love and happines and unfortunately you might have dropped your guard and allowed an emotional attachement to form. And slowly seen, even though common interests are apparent, that you both have small but important different expectations of the life to come.

    Is she younger than you? Maybe its just a maturity thing here. Give her some years and ideas change. I never wanted a child a few years back, but now, the idea is not as daunting or scary. No one can force it upon any one to bear a child... it might also be an indication that a friendship is all it should be kept to. And a good one too.

    Hope things will get better for you.

  3. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    It's an important matter in life, not something to be taken lightly and not set aside to have a relationship with another or it will backfire. It is good the both of you are honest about it. That's what a real friendship is.